


cabin fever

by nerducci



Category: Camp Camp (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Guilt, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Sex, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Isolation, Loneliness, M/M, Moral Dilemmas, Non-Explicit, Romance, Slow Burn, Spaceships, Suicidal Thoughts, kinda idfk how to tag lads, lowkey creepy behaviour but go off, passengers au bitchhhh, u know the movie passengers where they're on a spaceship, yeah it's that basically
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-07
Updated: 2019-11-04
Packaged: 2020-08-11 00:40:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 21,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20144689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nerducci/pseuds/nerducci
Summary: David is the only one awake.He breathes out slowly, his eyes widening with the realisation. “I woke up too soon.”Ninety years too soon. By the time everyone else wakes up, he will probably be dead.He's all alone on this ship.He's going to die here.





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAVE Y'ALL SEEN THE MOVIE PASSENGERS BECAUSE UHH. if not that's cool it'll still make sense!  
some dialogue in the first chapter is the same as in the movie but later it's different like it's the same plot different but different y'know 
> 
> i actually wrote this last year as a kevamie fic but i decided to rework it,, so if it randomly says kevin or jamie anywhere just tell me sDKSJDMFN,, 
> 
> aLSO unrelated but i watched secret obsession and,, i'm gonna make a danvid au of that too bc it fits their characters so well??so look out for that lmao
> 
> anyway i hOPE U LIKE THE FIC OK LET'S GO

The first thing he sees when he wakes up is bright and blinding light.

_This isn't his bedroom._

"Good morning, David. How are you feeling?"

"Huh?"

The face in front of him _looks_ human, but seems to be some kind of projection from an electronic screen. A hologram? David reaches a hand forward, and it passes straight through the woman's face. Where is he? Some kind of weird glass coffin box?

"It's perfectly normal to feel confused. You have just spent one hundred and twenty years in suspended animation."

He _what?_

"I'm- I- _what?_ Where am I?"

"You are a passenger on the Starship Avalon, the Homestead Company's premier interstellar starliner. We have nearly arrived at our destination: the planet Homestead II. A new world. A fresh start. Room to grow."

Oh. _Oh._

Oh.

Okay.

It's all coming back to him now. The voyage from Earth to Homestead II. Of course.

Okay.

"I've... been asleep for over a hundred years?" he whispers. It feels like only yesterday, saying goodbye to his friends and family, boarding the Starship Avalon - but over a _century_ has passed. David, along with the other five thousand and something passengers, will soon be arriving at Homestead II, ready to start a new life. It's _exciting._  
"H- how long until we disembark the ship?"

"The Starship Avalon is on final approach now. For the next four months, you will enjoy space travel at its most luxurious!"

"Oh, that's- that's good."

"Yes. The ID band on your wrist is your key to the wonders of the Starship Avalon!"

David glances at the band around his wrist, his head spinning a little.

"You are in perfect health, David. It's time to get you to your cabin so you can get some rest.”

"O- okay. That would be nice."

“Please step out of the hibernation pod."

_Hibernation pod?_

The glass pod he's lying in begins to tilt upwards until David is able to step out onto the smooth glass floor of the hibernation bay.

His cabin isn't a long way away, but his legs are wobbly and his body feels weird so the walk there is almost unbearable. _Why does he feel so dizzy? Is he supposed to feel this dizzy? _Okay, it probably makes sense, actually, considering the fact that he has been in hibernation for such a long time. He's vaguely aware of the hologram lady's voice saying something about post hibernation sickness. Well, that explains it, kind of.  
When he gets to his cabin, David sits down on the bed, disoriented. This place is weird. Like, _weird_ weird, like some crazy futuristic hotel room. Then again, he supposes, futuristic makes sense. He is essentially in the future.

It hits him that everyone he used to know is dead.

Cheery.

"Over the next four months you will meet your fellow passengers and prepare for..."

David zones out and stops listening to the electronic voice. It's probably important, but this is a _lot_ to take in, and he's literally floating in space right now.

_He's literally floating in space right now._

_He has been floating in space for more than a century. That is wild._

"-learning group fourteen, joining other passengers with trade and delivery service skills. Enjoy the rest of your journey on the Starship Avalon!"

"Wait, what?"  
  
"Over the next four months you will meet your fellow passengers and prepare for life on Homestead II by taking skill building classes and learning about colonial life on your new planet. You will join learning group fourteen, joining other passengers with trade and delivery service skills. Enjoy the rest of your journey on the Starship Avalon!"

“Oh, uh, thanks?”

The voice didn't reply after that, so David lies down and closes his eyes. He's tired as hell and today has been weird and confusing so far. It isn't long before he's completely unconscious.

In the morning - if it can be called that, even, seeing as time isn't exactly the same out here - David takes a shower and dresses in smart clothes. Today he's going to be meeting with the other people in his learning group, and although he isn't exactly sure what to expect, he's excited.  
This is it. He really is getting ready to begin life on a new planet.

What he isn't expecting, though, is for his learning group's room to be empty.  
_Maybe he's in the wrong room? No, he's pretty sure that this is right._

He's probably just early.

A video starts playing on the screen at the front of the room, though, and the hologram lady is back.  
“Hello, passengers. Will you all please take a seat,” she says, and David sits down. “Welcome, learning group fourteen. Your introduction to colonial life. Earth is a prosperous planet, the-”

“Wait, uh, I'm the only one here! Shouldn't we wait for-”

“Hold all questions until the end, please. Earth is a prosperous planet, the cradle of civilization. But for many, it's also overpopulated, overpriced, overrated.”

_Why didn't anybody else show up?_

“Where are all the other-” David begins, only to be interrupted with more information about Homestead II.

“The colonies offer an alternative, a better way of life."

“Where is everyone?” he asks, confused. Surely he can't be the only one in this group, right? There are several thousand passengers on the ship. Why is he the only one in the room?

“We are all on the Starship Avalon,” the hologram lady responds, somewhat unhelpfully.

“But no one else is here.”

“On the Starship Avalon there are five thousand passengers and over two hundred crew members.”

David sighs. This isn't answering any of his questions. “Why am I alone, then?”

“We are all in this together.”

This isn't getting him anywhere. He leaves the room and moves back down the corridor towards his cabin, starting to feel a little uneasy. He hasn't actually seen another person since he woke up from hibernation. Everyone else was awake too, right?

_But what if they're not?_

No, that's stupid, that's-

He breaks into a run, starting to panic.

This is fine.

He is fine.

There are thousands of other people on this ship. He just has to find someone, _anyone, _anyone who can stop him from feeling so alone.

“Hello?” he shouts as he runs, feeling himself starting to become more and more frantic.

_This is fine, it's fine. He's fine._

“Is anyone there? _Can anyone hear me?”_

He needs to find a crew member, someone who can tell him what's going on. Why didn't anyone else turn up to his learning group's introduction to colonial life? Why is this whole ship so quiet? _Why is he getting so panicky? This is fine. It's okay._

After running aimlessly for a while, David finds an elevator and gets inside.

“Take me to- to human beings, _please,”_ he implores, trying not to notice how shaky his voice sounds.

“Please buckle up and secure any loose items,” the elevator said. “This elevator will experience a momentary lapse in gravity.”

“A- a what? A momentary lapse in _what?”_

Before he can react, the elevator starts moving, and _shit he hasn't buckled up, he's floating and oh God the walls are glass and damn he really is floating in space-_

It's over as soon as it started. The elevator stops moving and David crashes back down onto the bench.

“Ouch,” he mutters, and leaves the elevator as fast as he can.

The place he steps out into seems to be a kind of plaza in what looks like some sort of shopping mall. There's a large fountain in the centre, and- _computers._ Oh, thank goodness. David rushes over to one of the machines and taps at the holographic screen.

“Welcome to the grand concourse aboard the Starship Avalon,” the computer says. “How can I help you?”

“I- I need to speak to someone, a person, please.”

“What kind of person would you like to speak to?”

“I don't know, someone- someone who's in charge?”

“The ship's steward is in charge of handling all passenger affairs. Level three of the grand concourse.”

David sighs in relief. Okay. This is going to be okay. “Thanks,” he says.

“Happy to help,” the computer replies, and displays a large smiley face on the screen.  
David just shakes his head and runs as fast as possible to the steward's office.

When he gets there, he exhales slowly, sheer dread replacing the air in his lungs.

The room is empty. The ship's steward isn't there.

“This isn't good,” David says quietly. “This can't be good.”

He runs back to the grand concourse and taps at the screen again.

“Who's flying the ship?” he demands, running a hand through his hair anxiously.

“The flight crew, the captain, the pilot, the-”

“Captain! The captain, I want to speak to the captain.”

“The captain rarely handles passenger queries,” the computer replies.

“Please, it's an emergency! I need to talk to someone, I- I need to talk to the captain!”

“The captain is usually found on the bridge, in the command ring.”

“Bridge. Command ring. Got it.”  
David takes off again and makes his way to the command ring. He finds the entrance to the bridge and scans the ID band on his wrist next to the door. The door opens, revealing another door behind it.

“Seriously?” he mutters, and scans the ID band a second time.

“Bridge access requires special authorisation,” says the door.

“What? No, that's not-”  
He swips the ID again.

“Bridge access requires special authorisation.”

“No no no- you've got to be kidding me-”  
David peers through the window on the door. It's small and hard to see through, but as far as he can tell, nobody is moving inside.

“Okay. This is fine. This is- there's got to be someone, somewhere.”

_This is starting to feel a little bit hopeless. _He can't really be the only one awake on this ship, though, right? There has to be someone else awake. There _has_ to be.

So David moves away from the bridge and continues his search for any signs of any other people. He finds other rooms. A swimming pool. Some sort of cafeteria. One that catches his eye is a large, dark room, filled with projections of stars and planets. He steps into the centre of the room and looked around. It's beautiful.

“Welcome to the observatory,” a voice says. Everything on this ship seems to have a voice. None of the voices are quite human. “What can I show you?”

“I'm- I think I'm the only person awake,” David says quietly. His voice sounds calm, but his hands are shaking. “And we're supposed to be landing soon, and I don't know what to do.”

“I don't understand,” said the room. “What can I show you?”

David feels like crying. What did he expect? Nothing here is human. Everyone he's spoken to so far has been some kind of computer or machine. They can't help him. “Uh, show me Homestead II, please.”

The projections in the room shift and change to show him the planet he's supposed to be going to.

“Homestead II is the fourth planet of the Bharkti System,” the voice says, and the room displays the other planets in the system.

“Right, okay,” David whispers, deep in thought. Four months. That's all it will take. Four months and he'll be there, his new planet, his new home. But why isn't anyone else awake?  
“Okay, uh, where are we now?”

“We are in transit from Earth to Homestead II. We will arrive in approximately ninety years.”

David freezes. He stops breathing momentarily. _Ninety years…?_ That can't be right.

“...What?”

“We will arrive at Homestead II in approximately ninety years, two weeks and four days,” the voice replies.

“What? Wait, that isn't- that can't be- how long ago did we leave Earth?”

“Approximately thirty years ago.”

_No. It can't- that can't be right._

David is the only one awake.

He breathes out slowly, his eyes widening with the realisation. “I woke up too soon.”

Ninety years too soon. By the time everyone else wakes up, he will probably be dead.

He's all alone on this ship.

He's going to die here.

_No no no no no._

_This isn't happening. This can't really be happening._

This absolutely _cannot_ be happening.

_He needs to send a message to Earth. Contact someone, find someone who can help. He needs help._

David sprints back to the grand concourse and skids to a stop at the computer.  
“I need to send a message to Earth! How can I do that?”

“Interstellar messages are sent by laser array,” the computer tells him. “This is an expensive service.”

“This is an emergency!” David exclaims and goes to record his message.

“Planet and connection?”

“Earth,” David states, clicking his fingers anxiously. “The Homestead Company? I'm- I'm emigrating to Homeworld II and I have an emergency.”

“I have a customer help line,” the computer supplies helpfully.

“Yes! Yes, customer helpline, yeah, that's good, that sounds right.”

“Begin message.”

“Uh, hi. My name is David, I'm travelling to Homestead II on the Starship Avalon prime interstellar starliner ship? Um, I have- I have a problem. I woke up too early. Like, way too early. I- I think there was something wrong with my hibernation pod, or…”  
He pauses to take several deep breaths before continuing.  
“The ship won't arrive for ninety years and all of the crew and the other passengers are still sleeping and _I don't know what to do. _Anyway, uh, I don't know how to get back to sleep and at this rate I'm- y'know. I could just… use a hand. Thanks.”

“Message sent,” the computer said, and David sighs, relieved. Maybe this is going to be okay after all. “Message will arrive in nineteen years.”

“Wait, what? Did you say-”

“Earliest reply in fifty five years.”

“Fifty five _years?”_

That is a long time. Okay, it isn't as long as _ninety _years, but it doesn't exactly give David any hope at all.

It looks like he's still going to die here.

Alone.

“We apologize for the delay,” the computer continues, unhelpfully. “That will be six thousand and twelve dollars.”

“Fuck that,” David mutters, fighting back tears.

There really is no hope.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "he's all alone on this ship" is how i feel about jaspdanvid someti-
> 
> ANYWAY comments are very appreciated so plz consider leaving a comment :)
> 
> see you next chapter!


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> figured i'd say fuck it and post chapter 2??

_There must be somebody else awake. There has to be._

But going back to the hibernation bay confirms that all of the other passengers are still asleep in their pods.

_"No no no,"_ David whispers, running from pod to pod. They're all asleep. All of them.

He pauses by his own empty pod, his heart beating erratically in his chest, pulse throbbing in his temples. The contract he signed back on Earth stated clearly that hibernation was safe. _It's supposed to be safe._ The pods are supposed to be failsafe.

So what the hell is going on here?

With one last glance at his pod, he breaks into a run, footsteps echoing in the tomb-like silence of the hibernation bay.

He isn't even sure where he's going, or what he's doing, but he has to do _something_. He sprints through the ship's corridors, back past the Observatory, past the corridor that leads to his cabin, until he reaches the Grand Concourse.

Something moves in the corner of his eye, making David jump.

He skids to a halt and takes a step back, turning towards the movement he's sure he saw.

Is that-? _No, it can't be._

A little way away there's some sort of bar. And behind the counter, there's-

_It is._ It's a person. A person standing at the bar counter, wiping down the surface and drying glasses.

"Oh my God," David breaths, and sprints towards them. He laughs breathlessly and slips into one of the barstools. "It's so good to see another person! I thought I was the only one awake!"

"It's nice to see you too," the bartender - a guy about David's age - says with a friendly smile. "What'll it be?"

"Huh? What do you- no, you don't understand. We're not _supposed _to be awake! We're supposed to be sleeping!"

"Why would you want to be sleeping? It's a lovely evening."

What is _with_ this guy? Doesn't he understand that there are still _ninety years _until the ship lands?

"Listen, the ship isn't going to land for almost a century," David says urgently. "We aren't supposed to be awake yet, we- we woke up too soon!"

"That's impossible," says the bartender. He's still smiling, seemingly unfazed by this whole situation. "The hibernation pods are completely failsafe. If you're awake, that means we're due to arrive in... about four months. Would you like a drink?"

_What?_

"Uh, a beer, please?"  
Usually he doesn't drink alcohol - at least, he didn't, back on Earth - but he needs something to take the edge off.

The bartender slides across to pick up a glass and- his movements are a little too smooth, almost unnaturally so, and as he moves back to take a bottle from the shelf behind him, David becomes aware that his legs are missing. In fact, everything below his torso is composed of metal and mechanical parts.

"Oh," he says bitterly. "You're a robot."

That's that. The one little spark of hope he had is now extinguished. He really is the only conscious human on this ship.

"Android, technically," the bartender corrects him with a smile. He slides David his drink.

With a small sigh, David takes a sip.

It isn't beer.

He pulls a face. "Is this _apple juice?"_

The android bartender just smiles. "Sorry, I don't understand."

"What? I- I asked for- actually, you know what? Never mind. So, uh, I guess it's just the two of us on this ship, huh? Not sure you exactly count, though. You're..."  
David sighs again. At least he has _someone _to talk to, even if they aren't exactly human. "My name's David, by the way," he says flatly, taking another sip of his apple juice.

"It's nice to meet you, David. My name's Jasper."

"Jasper?"

The android nods, and goes back to wiping glasses. "Y'know, you're the first person to come in here for a while. Are you looking forward to arriving at Homestead II?"

"Home- I told you, we aren't going to arrive for ninety more years. I woke up early."

"The passengers on the Starship Avalon wake up approximately four months before arrival," Jasper says. "The pods are designed to keep you asleep until then. They are flawless."

"How long is left of the journey?"

"Around ninety years."

_"Exactly."_

Jasper freezes momentarily and then nods. "Ah. I see. Your presence here is impossible!"

"But I'm _here,"_ David says, the exasperation apparent in his tone. "Something went wrong with my pod. I shouldn't be awake, but I am, and I don't know what to do. Can you help me?"

"Sorry, David, but I'm just a bartender. I'd help you if I could."

He lets out a long sigh. "Right. Of course. Sorry, I'm just... I'm scared. I'm not going to make it to Homestead II. I'm going to die on this ship, and I'm never going to see another human being again."

"The passengers on the Starship Avalon sleep for one hundred and twenty years in suspended animation, made possible by specially engineered hibernation pods," Jasper says unhelpfully. "If you want to see other human beings, they can be found in the hibernation bay."

David sighs again and closes his eyes. "Yeah, I know. I meant an _awake_ human, y'know? Someone I can actually talk to."

"I'd be happy to talk to you anytime, David."

_This is stupid._

"Thanks, Jasper," he says quietly. "I'm- alright, I think I'm going to go back to my cabin now. It's been a _really _long and stressful day, and... I have a lot of thinking to do. I need to find a- a way to fix this."

"Of course. Sleep well!" Jasper says cheerfully.

"Thanks."

***

Days pass by - weeks, maybe - and David loses track of now and then, day and night. Time means nothing. Sleep isn't easy, but when he does sleep, it's usually passed out at the bar. He spends most of his time there, because even if Jasper isn't exactly a real person, at least they can hold a decent conversation.  
Time seems to slip away in the worst possible way. It's moving but it's never _going anywhere._ Never really progressing. Never stopping or ending. It's like an endless, insufferable circle of just existing. David becomes overcome with lassitude and fatigue. It feels like he's beginning to lose grip on reality.

His cabin, the bar, this whole _ship_ \- it's a prison. It's about a kilometre in length, so the ship isn't cramped by any means, but still it's becoming increasingly claustrophobia inducing. Outside of the windows, there is infinite space. Literally the entire _universe,_ so close, but just out of reach.

_There's no way he's going to survive ninety years of this._

A little bit of alcohol wouldn't hurt, David reckons, but all Jasper gives him is juice or soda.

"Why don't you serve alcohol?" he asks, more than once. "This is a bar. Being able to order something a little stronger than fruit juice would be nice."

"Sorry, I don't understand," the android says in response every time, smiling.

Eventually David stops asking.

It's not like there isn't anything to do on the ship. There are plenty of things to distract him from the ever present truth that he's stranded alone in space. A basketball court, a swimming pool, roller skates and music and arcade games and even an ice rink. He even breaks into a fancier room, by Jasper's recommendation. He told David that there's an especially nice room called the Empire Suite. And David figures that, since he's the only person on the ship, it won't really affect anyone if he uses it. His own small cabin was starting to feel cramped and uncomfortable, and the Empire Suite is nothing less than luxurious in comparison.

David teaches himself about engineering and mechanics. He already knows a little, but he learns about the hibernation pods from the books he finds in the command ring. Anything that can help him go back to sleep.

He learns a lot, but nothing is particularly useful.

Breakfast is never great. Apparently only gold class passengers can access anything other than black coffee and boring cereal.

David is not a gold class passenger.

There are restaurants on the ship, too, though. A fancy Italian restaurant, a sushi place, a classic American diner - anything he wants, it's there for the taking. Well, technically he's supposed to pay for everything, but it isn't like he's going to be getting in any trouble for it. He'll be dead before anyone else wakes up.

Which is a little bit terrifying, actually. David throws himself in the most luxurious life he can possibly imagine, but he's never going to see another person ever again, and that is _scary._

He spends a lot of time in the hibernation bay, looking at all the other passengers sleeping so peacefully. Let's himself feel a little jealous. Sometimes he considers waking someone else up, for the sake of not going insane all on his own. He won't, though.

He can't.

He can't rob someone else of their life. It wouldn't be fair.

So he accepts the fact that he's going to die alone and possibly mildly insane on this ship. As the weeks turn into months, David feels his mind starting to fray at the edges. His sense of self coming undone. He's less focused, less bothered.  
His sleep schedule becomes a mess, and so does pretty much everything else.

He thinks about suicide, of course. There's no avoiding _that_ train of thought. Sometimes it feels like there is no other way out. But he can't. He can't bring himself to- he _won't._ Not now. Not after almost a year of surviving.

Just a little over eighty nine years to go.

***

David always dreamt of being somewhere new. Earth was never quite enough for him. He wanted a life of adventure. He wanted to travel through space and document it. He wanted his story to _matter._

He wanted to find new friends. Maybe even romance.

He didn't want to be alone anymore.

He doesn't want to be alone anymore.

***

David never imagined he'd be _outside_ the starship. But after he finds the room with the spacesuits and the airlock door, it becomes almost second nature for him to float out there. Nothing but the thick tether attaching him to the ship between him and the cosmos.

It's nice out there. Peaceful.

***

His mind is fraying. It's getting worse.

***

After a little over a year has passed, David knows that he can't take much more. Being alone like this... it's just too much. It's sending him spiralling, and he's afraid.

He finds himself at the airlock door, wearing nothing but his shirt and jeans.

David slides the lever down to reveal the red button. Red. Such a violent colour. A colour of romance and love and blood and death.

His finger hovers over the airlock button.

It's mocking him. Taunting him.

(Or maybe he's just losing his mind.)

A little bit of pressure against that button, and it'll be over. Without the suit, he'll die instantly. He'll freeze to death, probably. Or die from lack of oxygen. Maybe both? Whatever, it doesn't matter.

David's finger pushes against the button.

_Just a little more pressure. Just push a little harder and it will all be over._

He _really_ doesn't want to die.

_You can end it right now. You can do it. You'll be dead in seconds. It probably won't even hurt._

His breath is shaking, and so are his hands, and his legs and his _whole body_ is trembling and _no no no no no,_ what's he _doing? _He can't open the airlock, he can't- he can't _die!_

He slams the lever back up, covering the button, and spins on his heel, running from the door, running, running, it doesn't matter where.

He isn't going to die.

Not tonight.

***

David ends up in the hibernation bay. He collapses against a random pod, his heart pounding, chest heaving, gulping lungfuls of air because _he needs to stay alive. _He has to.

There are things that are worth living for. He isn't sure what they are, yet, but there's still hope. There's still hope.

After a minute - or maybe a few hours, it's hard to tell - David stands up shakily, leaning on the pod he's been resting against. It feels like his legs might collapse at any moment, so he stays put for a while, just leaning against the pod.

He looks inside, at the sleeping body behind the glass, and his breath catches. Suddenly the hibernation pod isn't a hibernation pod, it really is a glass coffin. Not in a dark way, though. It's magical. It's like something straight from a fairy tale.  
The guy lying inside the pod looks like an angel, his eyes closed peacefully and blonde hair falling around in his face. It falls towards his eyes, and David feels an urge to brush it away, to push it back off his face, to caress his pale skin-

David mentally slaps himself. _Stop it,_ his brain yells. _You shouldn't be admiring some random sleeping dude. It's creepy._

He glances at the screen to the side of the pod which displays the passenger's name.

"Daniel," David whispers, and smiles slightly. "I think I might be losing my mind."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ohohohoho


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ik it's friday so technically i'm supposed to be posting the next chapter of we come undone but i'm gonna take a break from that for a couple weeks just so i can get some more chapters written so i'm not stressed about it
> 
> ANYWAYS,

"It would be wrong of me to wake someone up, right?"

Jasper frowns. "Waking someone prematurely from their suspended animation earlier than intended would be efficiently sentencing them to death. They'd never live long enough to arrive on Homestead II."

"Right. Right, okay."  
David drinks the rest of his lemonade in silence.

"A few days ago I almost killed myself," he says quietly.

"Oh. I'm sorry."

"Yeah. But... then I didn't, and I went to the hibernation bay and I saw this guy. His name is Daniel. And I just- he's been on my mind, I don't know."

"Who is he?" Jasper asks, wiping the counter down.

David pauses. "Actually, I- I don't really know."

"Well, why don't you find out?"

"Jasp, he's asleep. He's still in his pod."

"If you search his name into a computer in the Grand Concourse, you should be able to find his passenger file."

"Passenger file?"

"You know, video diaries and logs, personal statements, background information - things like that."

_Oh._ That makes sense. David vaguely remembers making video diaries himself. So he can just... search Daniel's name into the computer and learn everything there is to know about him?

Well, that's... neat.

"Thanks, Jasper, I'll do that!" David says, getting up from his seat at the bar. "See you later."

"Happy to help!" Jasper answers, smiling as usual. "Good luck!"

David runs to the computer and types in Daniel's name, asking it to search for files. It starts playing a video, and he immediately recognises Daniel's face. God, he's even more attractive when he isn't unconscious in a hibernation pod.

_Don't get obsessed with him. You don't even know him._

He pushes the thought away and instead focuses on the video.   
"Wait wait wait," he says, pausing it and pulling his phone out of his pocket. The blue screen flickers on. "Can I download this onto my phone?"

"File downloading," says the computer. And then a moment later, "file downloaded successfully."

David goes back to the hibernation bay. He locates Daniel's pod and sits next to it, staring curiously at the sleeping figure within the glass box.

_Don't get obsessed._

Who _is_ he? What does he like to do? How does he _think?_

Everything about this stranger demands David's attention, and nothing else matters anymore.

_Who is he?_

David flicks at the phone's holographic screen and the video starts playing.

_He's about to find out._

It isn't long before David realises what the video is. It's a sort of interview about why Daniel wanted to leave Earth to move to Homestead II. Whoever is asking the questions is never on camera, but Daniel sits in the centre of his screen, a smug sort of look on his face, his posture totally laid back and relaxed.

_"-makes you want to leave Earth?"_ the interviewer asks.

Daniel laughs slightly. _"It's simple, really. Our planet is impure. It's filled with bad people. Filled with-"_ he pulls a face- _"weeds. Why would I want to stay here when I could travel through space? Start over on a clean, pure planet?"_

_"Is there anything in particular you wish to achieve by moving to Homestead II?"_

_"I want to experience new things with new people. I want to learn, and I want to teach. I want to be closer to understanding."_

_"Understanding what, exactly?"_

Daniel just smiles cryptically. _"Everything."_

_"Okay... and your file says you intend to stay on Homestead II for just three years?"_

_"That's right. I'll go to Homestead II, spend a little time living there, and then come back to Earth."_

_"What made you decide to do it that way?"_

Daniel tilts his head and smiles. _"Well, I'll be the first person in history to successfully travel to a planet so far away and make it back to Earth. Returning to Earth with that experience and knowledge will make me legendary. I'll be a god."_

_"But by the time you're back here, over two centuries will have passed. Everyone you know will be dead. Everything you know will have changed."_

At this, Daniel just laughs, and waves a hand dismissively at the camera. _"It doesn't matter! Don't you see? When I return, the earth will have changed for the better. Only the purest beings will survive what's coming. I know that things will be so much better when I get back. I have a few-"_

David pauses the video.

_Wow._

Daniel is... _not _what he was expecting. He isn't exactly sure what he _was _expecting, but... in all honesty, Daniel kinda seems like a bit of a weirdo.

Somehow, it leaves David feeling even more intrigued. 

Oh dear. 

Over the next couple of weeks, David spends all of his time there, sitting next to Daniel's sleeping body, watching every video on Daniel's file.

He's interesting and different and David can't understand why, but it draws him in. Even though he seems to have this sort of air of superiority about him. It's comforting, though, somehow. The confidence he radiates. Daniel's so sure of himself. He knows exactly who he is and what he wants. Those are things that David has never been able to figure out for himself, and he admires it.

Daniel is so beautifully _unusual,_ and David finds himself falling in love with the way his mind works. The way he talks. He's so charismatic and charming and so very attractive.

More and more David thinks about waking him up. Oh, he'd give anything to talk to him. To have a proper conversation, and get to know him in person, not just by watching these videos on repeat.

The more he watches them, the more he wants to _know _Daniel.

_Don't get obsessed._

_Do not do that._

(He's just a little bit obsessed.)

(He can't help it, though. David has never met anybody even remotely like Daniel. Someone so bold and confident and almost mildly infuriating because of how wonderfully self assured he seems to be.)

(Okay, he's a little bit obsessed, but that's okay. He just has to convince himself that he isn't falling in love or something stupid like that.)

It doesn't _matter._ However obsessed he is with this complete and total _stranger_ \- it doesn't change anything. He's never going to _know _Daniel because he _isn't going to wake him up. _He decided that way back. He can't wake anybody up because he can't condemn anyone to the same awful fate that he's doomed to suffer.

David speaks to Jasper about Daniel a lot.

"I get that he's a complete stranger," he says, stirring his straw absent mindedly in his diet coke. "But I'm just... _interested, _you know? I've been through his whole passenger file and he's just- I don't even know, he's just so different and intriguing."

"He definitely sounds like an interesting person," Jasper says, wiping a glass. He smiles understandingly, which is odd considering that he probably doesn't have the best understanding of human emotions. "It's normal to feel curious about him."

"Right." David sighs and stares off into space. After a minute of silence, he speaks again. "Hey, can I ask you a question?"

"Sure, David, what's on your mind?"

"I'm your only customer. How come you're always cleaning?" 

"Ah. Trick of the trade," Jasper replies, smiling. "A bartender just standing and not doing anything makes people super uncomfortable, see? It makes them feel nervous."

David smiles slightly. "Right. That... actually kind of makes sense." He downs the rest of his drink. "Well, I'm going to try and get some sleep. I'll see you tomorrow."

"See you, David. Sleep well."

He doesn't sleep well. He doesn't sleep at all, in fact. Too much on his mind. Instead, David wanders mindlessly down the corridors of the Starship Avalon. It isn't like he's going to _get_ anywhere, but it feels good to be moving around.

It's almost second nature now to walk to the hibernation bay and quickly locate Daniel's pod. The more time he spends there, the more he becomes aware that he is getting too obsessed with Daniel - but it doesn't stop him from visiting the sleeping passenger's pod.

"I want to know you," David whispers, hand pressing against the glass. "I mean, I feel like I know you already, but... I want to _really_ know you. I want to talk to you and be with you but I _can't. _I- I can't. It wouldn't be fair."

The second he stops talking, the room falls into a deathly silence.  
For the first few months he spent alone, the silence was overwhelming and crushing.

Deafening.

But after a little while, David got used to it. Talking to Jasper helps. A lot. Other than him, though, there was no one to talk to. And the loneliness is _always_ there. He can get used to the silence, but he can never get used to being completely alone.

Now the quiet of the room feels natural, normal.

_"I don't want to be alone anymore,"_ David whispers.

***

"I'm not going to do it. Like you said, it- it would be as good as sentencing him to death. I can't do it."

Jasper just smiles. "It's for the best, David. You wouldn't really want somebody else to suffer the same fate as you, would you?"

Of course not. He doesn't want that. He _hates_ being stuck on this ship. He can't force somebody else to endure this torture alongside him.

***

"I'm going mad," David says, sipping his orange juice slowly. "I'm losing my mind."

"Still thinking about Daniel?" Jasper asks, wiping the counter down.

"What? No, no, I'm- I decided that I'd stop thinking about it. There's nothing I can do about it. That's the end of it, really. I'm not going to think or talk about him anymore."

There's a sort of uncertainty to Jasper's smile that David doesn't pick up on. "If you say so, David."

***

"I'm going to go completely insane if I stay on this ship much longer."

"If you leave the ship, you'll die."

"I know! I- I tried to, a while ago, but I can't, I'm too scared, I can't- I don't want to die! But I'll lose my mind if I stay here any longer."

"It seems like a lose-lose situation," Jasper says sympathetically.

David groans. "That's what I'm _saying!_ There's no answer."

"There's always an answer, David."

He sighs, and decides to try approaching it from a different direction.   
"What would you do if you were in my position?" he asks. "What should I do? I met someone who I think I'm a little bit in love with, and I have the power to turn his pod off. I can wake him up. It'll make my life a hundred times better to be with another human. My life would be so much easier, so much happier."

"Well, then, you have to wake him up!" Jasper answers, smiling brightly. "If you're sure it'll improve everything, it's obviously the only way!"

"But... if I wake him up, I'll be effectively taking his life. He'll never see Homestead II. I'll be killing his dreams. And his future. And _him._ I'll be a murderer."

"Oh, well, you can't do that."

"Jasper!"

"Yes?"

David sighs again. "Never mind."

***

"Jasper. If I wake him up, I'll regret it, right?"

"Your human emotions are complex and confusing. But, yes, the chances of you regretting waking Daniel up are high. Of course, the guilt might not outweigh the benefits of waking him. It's hard to know."

David grimaces. Jasper has a point. There's know way of knowing how it'll turn out, unless he-

***

"I'm going to do it."

***

"I can't. I already said, I'm not going to even think about him anymore. Enough is enough."

"If you're sure, David."

***

A year and two weeks of being alone is enough to drive anyone to madness.

David isn't quite there yet, but he sure is slipping.

He can't do it anymore. He can't go on like this.

And yet he can't bring himself to end his life.

He knows what he needs to do.

There is no other choice.

***

He isn't thinking anymore. Not about anything.

David's mind is numb as he drops the toolbox on the floor of the hibernation bay next to the pod where he's been spending so much time recently. His thoughts are nothing more than white noise.

His fingers tremble as he removes the panel at the bottom of the pod and gets to work. David learnt a lot about the hibernation pods during his time alone on the ship. He can't turn his back on, but he does know how to disable a pod.

_In case of emergency._ The pods aren't supposed to be disabled before the end of the journey, but in an emergency, it's possible.

_He shouldn't be doing this. _David hates himself for it as he works at the electronic panel on the pod. _This isn't fair. This is so deeply cruel. This is the most despicable thing he has ever done._

But this _is_ an emergency. He _can't_ stay here on his own any longer.

The light in Daniel's pod blinks on, and David stands up, his legs feeling weak beneath him.

_No. No no no no no._

_He shouldn't have done that._

He should _not_ have done that.

As he watches Daniel stir from his sleep and start breathing again, David is filled with an instant and intense regret.

He throws the tools back into his toolbox and runs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OHHHHHHHHHH
> 
> u kno what i'm in the mood for??? fluffy jaspdanvid 
> 
> (ik jasper's an android bartender in this but-)
> 
> ((that was a joke))
> 
> (((kinda))))


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CHAPTER 4 LET'S GO!

"Jasper, I did it, I woke him up!" David blurts out the second he reaches the bar.

"Congratulations!" the android says.

"No no no, you don't get it, this is _terrible! _When he finds out I woke him up, he'll-"  
David groans and pulls at his hair.  
"What have I _done? _What- what do I do now? I'll go to my cabin, I think. I can't face him right now. And he probably needs time to adjust, so..."

_He's a murderer. Daniel is going to be trapped here too now and he's going to die and it's all David's fault._

"Jasper, if you see Daniel, don't tell him that I woke him up. Just- let him believe that his pod malfunctioned, or something. Like mine did. He can't know. I'll- I have to tell him myself, I think. When the time is right."

Jasper nods. "Of course. I'll keep your secret."

"Thanks."

***

_I did it. I woke him up._

When David wakes up, his first thought is of Daniel.

He made a mistake. That was a _bad_ idea.

But he has to face the facts. He woke Daniel up, and now he has to deal with the consequences.

Which includes going to talk to Daniel. David has been stranded on the ship for a little over a year now; he has experience being here. He knows how things work.

If Daniel is anything like David had been after he'd woken from suspended animation, he's probably running around panicking, trying to find another real life person. And David is the only other real life person. Which means he has to be there for Daniel.

David finds Daniel in the Grand Concourse. He's pacing around in circles, but he looks surprisingly calm.

And then he looks up and he sees David and his eyes widen.  
"Hey!" Daniel exclaims, walking over to him.

David does his best to smile. He opens his mouth to say something but he freezes, paralysed by guilt and nerves and sheer relief at finally being near another human being. And then suddenly there are hands touching his face.

"You're real?" Daniel asks quietly, almost nervous, and David nods. "Really real? You're not a computer or a robot or-"

"N- no, I'm real," David manages to say.

Daniel smiles, taking a step back. Any trace of nervousness is gone. "Oh, that's good," he says, suddenly ridiculously calm given the situation. "I was starting to think that I was the only one awake." He laughs like the very notion is preposterous. "Crazy, right?"

"Uh, not entirely," David mumbles, unable to meet his eye. He stares at his shoes.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, there- there aren't- uh, we're- I'm actually the only one here."

Daniel freezes. His expression changes slowly from confusion to shock and then straight back to neutral. "You mean everyone else is still asleep?"

"Yes, that's... yeah." David takes a deep breath, still avoiding eye contact. "Th- the ship doesn't land for almost eighty nine years."

"We woke up too early," Daniel states. It isn't a question. David says nothing. "Okay. Okay, okay, okay. We can just go back to sleep, though, right?

David shakes his head slowly. "I'm sorry, I- I've tried. I've tried everything. There's no way to get back to sleep."

"Okay." Daniel takes in a breath and lets it out slowly. "What about the captain? Surely the captain can help."

"I tried. No one else is awake. I'm sorry."

Daniel frowns. "There must be a way to fix this. We can't just be stuck here on our own."

"But we are," David says quietly. _Guilt guilt guilt guilt guilt._ "I'm sorry. Believe me, I've done everything I can."

"How... long have you been awake?"

"...A little more than a year."

"Oh," Daniel says, "you've been alone all this time? That must have been hard for you."

"Y- yeah... it's been... tough."

"I can't even imagine." Daniel smiles slightly. "Guess it's pretty lucky for you that I woke up, huh?"

"I- I- I- I don't- I mean, I guess I- I... I mean- I'm sorry."

"You don't have to be sorry. This is hardly your fault."

_Oh, God, he has no idea how wrong he is._

"I guess I'm kinda lucky too," Daniel says. "That I'm not on my own like you've been.

David cringes a little, the guilt wrapping itself around his mind. Daniel isn't _lucky. _He's _doomed, _and it's all David's fault.

But Daniel doesn't know that. And he won't have to be on his own.

And David isn't alone anymore.

So maybe, in a way, they _are_ kind of lucky.

"I never did catch your name," Daniel says with a slight raise of his eyebrows. His voice is smooth and confident and he seems so _calm. _David wonders how he isn't freaking out.

_Answer the question._ "I'm David," he manages.

"David," Daniel repeats, and smiles. He reaches out to shake David's hand. "My name's Daniel."

David shakes his hand, fighting the urge to say _"I know"_.

There's a short moment of silence.

"So," Daniel begins, drawing out the sound a little too long. "What are we supposed to do now?"

Right.

What _are _they supposed to do now? God, David didn't really think this through. They don't even know each other, and now they're stuck on a ship together.

But at least he's not alone anymore.

Okay, he'll show Daniel around the ship. They can get to know each other.

Daniel needs him. Adjusting to being almost completely alone on a mostly unfamiliar spaceship is going to be hard for him, so David will do everything he can to help him adapt.

_It's his fault Daniel's awake anyway. It's his responsibility._

Okay. David will introduce him to Jasper. Maybe get some nice food. Anything to relieve the tension a little.

So he leads Daniel towards the bar.  
"Okay, uh, there's somebody I'd like to introduce you to," he tells Daniel. "He's not exactly human, but he's the only company I've had for the past year. I- I think you guys will get along."

Daniel smiles slightly. "Oh? So, who is this mystery person?"

"I mean, he's... not exactly a person. His name's Jasper and he's a robot bartender. An android bartender."

"Wait, did you say bartender?"

"Yeah! Here we are," David says, leading Daniel to the bar counter. "Jasper, I'd like you to meet Dan-"

"Get me something to drink," Daniel demands, "I don't care what."

David panics. No, no, no, this isn't going as planned! Jasper and Daniel need to like each other!  
"I- Daniel-! Um, sorry, Jasper, he's had a really crazy day."

"It's okay, David," Jasper says, but frowns slightly.

"So, uh, Daniel, this is Jasper, Jasper, meet Daniel. He, uh- he woke up... too."

"It's nice to meet you, Daniel."

"Nice to meet you too," Daniel replies. "Can I get a drink?"

"He doesn't actually serve alcoh-" David begins, but he's interrupted by Jasper.

"Of course," he says, and David doesn't miss the unusually cold tone to his voice. For once, he isn't smiling. "How would you feel about a French martini?"

Daniel smiles. "Sounds perfect."

David looks between the two of them, gaping slightly. "Wait, you have _alcohol?"_

"Of course!" Jasper answers, and slides Daniel his drink, looking slightly perplexed. "This is a _bar,_ David."

"I'm not- I know, but-"  
David gives an exasperated sigh and rests his head in his hands.  
"What are the chances of me getting something slightly stronger than apple juice?"

"Not very high," Jasper states simply.

"I can't believe you've had alcohol all along and you've been _withholding_ it from me this _whole_ time," David mutters, drumming his fingers on the counter. "And he comes in and you just... give it to him? That's not fair."

"Stop complaining," the android replies, handing David a Capri Sun. "It was for your own good."

David glares at Daniel.  
"How's your martini?" he asks pointedly.

"It's very good, thank you."

"Good," David says, scowling slightly. How come Daniel's allowed alcohol but he isn't? That isn't fair!

"So," Jasper says, wiping the counter down. "How has your day been so far?"

"Not the best," Daniel replies, staring into his drink. "All my hopes and dreams were shattered the second I woke up, and now I'm going to be stuck on this ship forever until I die."

David is struck with intense guilt. _God, _why did he wake Daniel up? It was such a cruel thing to do. It was so _selfish._

"Sorry to hear that," Jasper says quietly.

"Whatever." Daniel finishes his drink. "I'm going to bed."

He leaves the bar, and there's a long pause before Jasper speaks. "Why did you wake him up again? He seems like a douchebag."

"Jasper!" David exclaims. "Try not to judge him too much. You remember how super freaked out I was when I first woke up, right? He's probably just... struggling to adjust. Give him a chance, okay?"

"I don't like him, dude. He gives me bad vibes."

"Jasper, please. Just- give him a few days to calm down."

"I don't know, David, he's kind of... something," he says, his face pretty emotionless. "But if he treats me with respect, I'll do the same for him."

"Thank you." David sighs. "I should probably go see if he's okay..."

"See if _he's _okay? What about me? My feelings are deeply hurt."

"Jasper, no offence, but I'm like eighty percent sure that you don't actually have feelings."

"I mean... you're not wrong." Jasper smiles. "Have a wonderful evening, David."

"Thanks, Jasper, you too."

In all honesty, he didn't exactly expect Daniel to act like... that. But equally, David understands how hard it is, adjusting to being stuck on this ship. Daniel's probably struggling to process it, and needs some time to figure out how he feels about the whole situation. And he's probably really tired. It's been a long day.

And, to be fair, it is David's fault that Daniel is awake in the first place.

He leaves the Grand Concourse to go and find Daniel.

_Daniel is his responsibility. David has to take care of him. It's his fault, his fault, his fault._

_No._ He couldn't have done anything any differently. He was going insane before, he- no, there's no way he could have survived much longer on his own. He didn't have a _choice._

_It doesn't matter. What's done is done._

He finds Daniel's room quickly. He's been to this part of the ship before; this room - the Seoul Suite, it's called - is listed on Daniel's passenger file. Of course, David hasn't been inside, but he has spent more time than he'd like to admit standing outside the door and wondering what it would be like to be here with Daniel. He'd walk Daniel back to his room after spending the evening with him. Maybe Daniel would invite him inside. Maybe they'd even spend the night together. It's a daydream that he's entertained a couple of times.  
And here he is again, but this time Daniel's inside. This time Daniel is really awake. This time, they can really be together.

David pushes the thought away. He knows that it would probably seem creepy and predatory if he tried to pursue a relationship with Daniel, and then Daniel will hate him forever and-

Okay, he's getting ahead of himself. Nothing's really going on here. He only came to see if Daniel is okay. That isn't creepy. That's nice. At least, he thinks it's nice.

Or is it? Maybe it is creepy. Maybe he should just turn around and go back to his own room. Maybe run a bubble bath and try not to drown in the crushing guilt of what he has done. Yeah, that's what he'll do.

He's just about to turn and leave when Daniel's door opens.

Daniel's expression is somewhere between perplexed and amused. "I _thought _I heard voices. Are... you talking to yourself?"

Shit, has he been talking to himself? Oh, well, isn't that just horribly mortifying?

"Uh, no?" David says nervously, "I... think you were hearing things."

"No, you were _definitely_ talking to yourself. Something about drowning in bubble bath?"

David feels himself blushing. "Not quite. But, uh, points for trying?"

Daniel laughs slightly and shakes his head. "David."

"Yeah?"

"What are you doing outside my room?"

Oh. _Oh._ "Oh! I'm- I came to check if you're okay. You seemed upset. And I just... I just wanted to..."  
He trails off and stares at the floor. This is stupid. He shouldn't have come.

"Thank you," Daniel says, surprisingly softly, and David's pretty sure his heart just stopped beating. "It means a lot." He pauses, and then opens the door a little wider. "Come in."

Even if he wanted to refuse, David knows he probably wouldn't be able to. The way Daniel says those two words is so authoritative, and David wonders how he manages to do that. How he manages to make one simple request impossible to refuse.

In that moment, David thinks that if Daniel told him to walk off a cliff, he'd do it. Before today, David was in control. He had power over Daniel, the power to wake him from suspended animation. Now, though, Daniel has power over him. The way he acts, the way he speaks, it draws David in - just like the video logs did, only now it's ten times stronger - and he knows that Daniel knows.

It's nice. It's nice being able to let someone else take charge.

Daniel smiles at him as he closes the door behind them. It was impossible to tell when he was asleep, and the videos didn't do it justice, but Daniel's eyes are so very, very blue.

It isn't just nice, David realises. It's intoxicating.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> have y'all seen the society on netflix?? i'm thinking of writing a cc fic inspired by that with like,, all of the campers and the woodscouts and flowerscouts?? idk i just thought that would be pretty cool sFMDMGMDMF (i'm only on like episode 3 tho so shhh)
> 
> unrelated but doom days by bastille is SUCH a daniel song. it's SUCH a daniel song y'all


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey idk if this is entirely coherent because i wrote some of it at 4am yesterday and some at 1am today but whatever

David thought that the suite he's been living in was fancy, but this is on a whole new level. He gasps upon entering, not entirely able to process it. The walls aren't _walls._ In their place is a vast expanse of city lights and huge, towering buildings stretching into the distance. It's like they're standing on the roof of a skyscraper in the middle of a city. The sky is a dark velvet blue, but the twinkling lights all around make it seem brighter than anything David has ever seen.  
And the _sounds-_ traffic sounds, engines revving and horns screeching and a car alarm blaring in the distance. People shouting on the streets below. Pulsing techno music from a club.  
He steps to the edge of the roof- the _room-_ and looks down. There are cars and people down there. It's like the city is alive. The vertigo hits him instantly and he stumbles backwards. _Damn,_ it's realistic. He knows that it's just a hologram, that if he reached his hand out it would hit the wall he can't see. He knows that the people down there aren't real. He knows that these noises are pre-recorded sounds playing from some sort of surround sound speaker system. He knows that this is just a boring, basic room.

But it feels so _real._

He turns to Daniel, who's watching for his reaction to this unbelievable room.

"Well?" Daniel asks. "What do you think?"

"It's _amazing,"_ David breathes, spinning around, trying to take it all in.

"I should hope so. I paid three thousand dollars for this."

"I've never been in a city before! Is this really what it's like? It's so _loud!"_

Daniel doesn't say anything for a while. And then he takes David's hand and leads him up some stairs that he hadn't seen before, up to a mezzanine level with nothing but a huge luxurious bed.

"Sit," Daniel says, and David sits.

The sheets are soft and dark and there's a sort of canopy curtain draping down on either side. There are lots of soft pillows and the mattress is nice and it's genuinely the most comfortable bed he's ever sat on. He's about to say so when Daniel speaks.

"You've really never been in a city?"

David blinks twice. "What? Oh! No, I've never seen anything like this. I mean, I've passed through cities, but I grew up in the country, so..."

"I'd love to see the countryside," Daniel says quietly, sitting beside him on the bed. "Not many people get a chance to see trees anymore."

Most people back on Earth lived in cities; there wasn't much countryside left, so growing up somewhere rural was rare. Being able to walk through a forest wasn't something most people would ever have the opportunity to do.  
It makes David sad to think about. How much of the earth's natural beauty has been destroyed. He considers himself lucky, having grown up surrounded by nature, but it wasn't common anymore. That's part of reason why so many people were choosing to emigrate to the colony planets.

It hits him that he'll never see a tree again. It feels like someone punching him in the stomach.

"I'm sorry for how I acted before," Daniel begins, obviously thinking carefully about the words he chooses. "It just sort of hit me that I'm never going to make it off this ship. I didn't mean to upset you or your... friend."

"It's okay," David says quietly. "I get it. I've been through it." _And it's my fault that you're going through it too._ "Are... are you feeling okay now?"

Daniel pulls a face and lies down on the bed. "Honestly, I feel kinda jet lagged."

"Oh," David says, and then, _"oh! _How could I forget about post hibernation sickness? That makes sense, have you- fluids, you need fluids. Have you had anything to drink today? Other than that martini- oh, no, that's not good- have you had any water? I'll get you some water, wait here-"

David gets up and stumbles down the steps as fast as possible. He manages to find the bathroom, and fills up a glass with water from the tap before going back up the stairs.

"Here," he says softly, "sit up. You should drink this. Have you had anything to eat since you woke up? You should have something to eat."

"Thanks," Daniel says as he sits up and takes the glass of water. He sips it slowly and then gives a slight laugh. "Feels like I haven't eaten in, like, thirty years."

David can't stop himself from laughing a bit at that. "I can go get you some food...?"

"Yes, please."

"Any requests?"

Daniel hums as he considers the question. "Something salty. And chocolate. And ice cream- _God, _I want ice cream."

"Okay," David says with a smile. "I'll be as fast as I can. You just stay here and rest until I get back, okay?"

"Mm." Daniel sets the glass of water down on the floor and lies down again, pulling a pillow over his face.

David goes to the main food shop on the ship. It's already unlocked. He figured early on that taking food from shops was probably a necessity for surviving, and it won't hurt anyone. Plus, he isn't a gold class passenger, which means the breakfast available for him is pretty grim. He'd much rather buy- steal- some poptarts and toast them in the comfort of his suite. So, he broke into the shop. That was a pretty stressful day. Breaking in set an alarm off, and it took five hours to get it to shut up.  
Of course, there are restaurants on the ship, but sometimes you just crave a weirdly specific food that you can only really find at a grocery store. Being able to access whatever he wants whenever he wants it is great. Obviously at first he was concerned about quantities, and even tried to ration food, but then he discovered that the ship uses its technology to preserve food for long periods of time, and there's a huge storeroom packed with enough food to feed millions. Now, he can take what he wants without worrying about running out, which he's grateful for.

David throws some chocolate and some ice cream and a box of Ritz crackers into a bag. He then decides that he should probably get some slightly more nutritional food for Daniel as well; so he picks up some vegetables and some cereal and milk and anything else that he can think to grab.

When he gets back to the room, it isn't a city anymore, it's a room. A plain white room. A _nice_ room, at that, but so completely different from how it was before. There's a kitchen unit to one side, and David goes to put away the frozen food he picked up in the freezer, and sets everything else on the table to sort later. He takes the Ritz crackers up the stairs for Daniel.  
Daniel is fast asleep on his bed. Of course, David has seen him sleeping before, but not like this. Trapped in a glass hibernation pod, yes - but not here on a soft bed, relaxed and comfortable, a slight smile on his face. It's nice. David takes a blanket from the bed and drapes it over Daniel, who stirs slightly and opens one eye.

"I brought you some crackers," David whispers with a nervous smile.

Daniel groans slightly and reaches out to take the crackers from him. "Bless you," he mumbles, opening the box surprisingly quickly for somebody who's half asleep. He shoves several crackers into his mouth.

"Hey, careful," David says. "You could choke."

Daniel doesn't seem to care. He gets through a third of the box in two minutes, and then hands it back to David. "Thank you," he whispers, clearly exhausted, and collapses onto the bed again, pulling the covers around himself.

"No worries. I'm, uh- I'm gonna go back to my room and let you rest, okay?"

_"Nooo," _Daniel whines softly. He sounds extremely tired. "Stay with me."

Again, David gets the feeling that he doesn't really have a say in the matter.

It's kind of comforting. Daniel wants him to stay. He wants to stay, too. Even if he probably doesn't deserve to.

David reminds himself that the 'run a bubble bath and try not to drown in the crushing guilt of what he has done' plan is still an option.

"Okay," he says, and joins Daniel on the bed. "I'll stay with you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> haha that's pretty gay


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i was gonna post this yesterday but i fell aSLEEP FMDMFMDFMGN SORRY

David wakes up in a forest.

He feels it before he sees it. Even with his eyes closed, he knows. Birds singing. Soft wind rustling the leaves of trees. The _smell, _the soft scent of pine and fresh, clean air.

He opens his eyes and sees the trees. Smiles. Wonders how he ended up here.

And then he becomes aware of arms wrapped around his body and soft puffs of breath against the back of his neck.

_Daniel._

And- it's not a forest, it's a room- _it's a room, _and the spell is broken.

Daniel exhales loudly and shifts behind him. He nuzzles David's neck lightly and hugs him a little tighter. "Morning," he whispers sleepily.

"Morning," David echoes, flushing slightly as Daniel buries his face in his neck. They're so _close,_ is- is this okay? They hardly know each other. They're practically strangers! Not that David is complaining, this is nice. This is _really_ nice. He hasn't had physical contact for a year. Well, for over thirty years, actually, but- _God,_ he missed this.

"You're so warm..." Daniel mumbles against his skin. "I want to stay like this forever..."

_Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck._ David wants that too. He wants to stay in this bed with Daniel and cuddle him and maybe kiss him and maybe even take it a step further and-

David stops himself before he can start thinking about... _that._ It's inappropriate! It's-

Oh boy.

"Um," David says, and mentally kicks himself for not being able to start a sentence normally. "We're... in a forest."

"Mm." Daniel stretches slightly and wraps his arms even tighter around David. "I woke up in the night and craved trees. Do you like it?"

David has to take a couple of deep breaths because 'I woke up in the night and craved trees' is the single most relatable thing he has ever heard. "I like it a lot!" he says. _I like you a lot. I like this. I like you I like you I like you-_

"Good," Daniel says, and rubs his face against David's neck again. "I'm _sooo _tired. Wanna go back to sleep..."

"Me too," David replies without really thinking.

"Stay with me?"

David feels like crying. Out of guilt or hapiness or sheer relief, he isn't really sure. "Of course."

This is so nice. This is so nice that it _hurts. _He's wanted this so desperately for so long and now he has it and it's almost painful how much he wants this. How much he _needs _this. No one has ever held him like this, really. But back on Earth, at least, he had friends and family to talk to and be close with. This past year, though? He's had _nothing. _And now he has _this,_ and it's _amazing._

And he knows that he doesn't deserve it. He knows that he did something _despicable_ to get this, and he shouldn't have done it. He shouldn't have this. He doesn't deserve this.

"Mm, you're so soft," Daniel says, his voice muffled by David's shoulder.

He _definitely _doesn't deserve this.

He sure as hell wants it though.

***

When he wakes up again, he's alone. It makes him a little sad, but he knew it wasn't going to last forever, as appealing as that sounds. He rolls over to stare at the ceiling. Even that is a hologram, soft sunlight streaming through the canopy of green leaves, a hint of blue sky beyond that. It looks so real. Like he's really lying in a forest.

That makes him a little sad, too. He'll never really lie in a forest again. He'll never feel solid ground beneath his feet again. He'll never touch the rough bark of the trees or paddle in a river or hear real birds singing.

If his hibernation pod hadn't malfunctioned, he'd probably be able to experience those things on Homestead II.

David wonders if, had he made it to Homestead II, he and Daniel would be friends. Or maybe even more. Would they know each other?

God, that would be so perfect. They'd both be where they wanted to be. Together. Three years would pass and Daniel would be ready to return to Earth, but David would convince him otherwise, and he'd stay. They'd be together. They'd be happy. They'd have friends, and jobs, and _lives. _They could get married. Have kids. Maybe a dog. Are there even dogs on Homestead II? Whatever. It doesn't matter, because none of that will ever happen now.

He wonders if, perhaps, they could have ever been friends on Earth. Maybe if they'd both stayed, they would have met by some miracle. They would get married, and their friends and family from Earth wwould be there to celebrate with them. Daniel would take David to see the city, and David would take Daniel to the country, and they would be happy.

Maybe if they'd stayed on Earth, they would be happy.

"I made coffee," someone says, dragging him from his daydreams. "Sorry about last night. I get kinda cuddly when I'm tired. If I made you uncomfortable, or-... hey, are you crying?"

David hurriedly sits up and wipes his eyes. "No."

"What's the matter?" Daniel says, frowning slightly. David didn't hear him come in. He doesn't look great. His hair is a mess and he looks like he's been crying himself.

"Have you been crying?" David asks quietly, ignoring Daniel's question. He doesn't want to admit that he made himself sad by imagining everything they could have been.

"What? No. Of course not." Daniel looks away. "I brought you coffee."

"Thanks."

Daniel hands him the cup, and sits down next to him on the bed, and for five minutes they're silent.

And then Daniel nudges his arm and points at something. "Look."

David looks. A little way away, between the trees, there's a deer. It watches them for a minute before turning and running away. David smiles. "How does it work?"

"I don't know," Daniel replies with a small shrug. "I like it, though. Y'know, there's this remote control thingy, and if you hit the buttons, you can change the room to pretty much anything."

"Can you make it into a beach?" David asks, grinning.

Daniel grins back and gets up. "Wait here." He's down the stairs in seconds, and suddenly they're at the beach.

David laughs and runs down the stairs after him. "This is _amazing!" _he exclaims, turning around to take it all in. "Look, there's a little boat out there! Oh my gosh!"  
His smile drops, and he sighs. "I'd love to go on a boat... or swim in the sea..."

"There's a swimming pool," Daniel says quietly. "I hear it has a pretty cool wave machine. What do you say we go for a swim?"

Well, he's not wrong. It's not the same, though. "Maybe another time."

"David. Come on, let's go do something. We can't fix this. We're stuck here. There's no point in just sitting around feeling sorry for ourselves."

"I _know that._ I've been here for a _year._ I just-"  
David tries unsuccessfully to stifle a sob.

"Sorry," Daniel whispers. "I forgot..."

"No, no, it's okay, I just... some days it just hits a little harder." David wipes his eyes and stares out at the ocean. The fake, _fake_ ocean. "And now that you're here too, I... I'm starting to wonder what it would be like on Homestead II. If we'd met there instead, y'know? I know it's stupid, I just- I like you. You're nice. I think we would have been friends."

"It isn't stupid." Daniel smiles sympathetically and opens his arms in invitation. David moves forwards to hug him. It's a nice hug. Being in Daniel's arms is nice. "I think you're right. We would have been friends."

Being in Daniel's arms is _very _nice. David hugs him tightly, scared to let go.

"And I think you're nice too," Daniel continues, his voice low in David's ear. "And I know we barely know each other, but... I already feel quite... attached to you."

_Attached?_

David pulls back slightly, his eyes wide. "Really?"

"Really." Daniel laughs slightly. "I hope that isn't a problem."

"No! No no no! No, it's not a problem! Of course it's not! I- me too!"

"Good." With a smile, Daniel takes hold of David's hand and squeezes it gently. "Come on, let's go for a walk or something. We should probably get out of this room for a bit."

***

David takes him to the observatory. It's a nice place to go. Or, it _was,_ for a while. David hasn't been here in a couple of months. He doesn't like to remind himself that he's floating aimlessly through space. However, Daniel seems to like it a lot, so it's a success in his books.

"Don't you just love the stars?" Daniel asks, getting as close to the massive glass window as possible and looking out at the endless cosmos before them.

"I liked them a lot more when I was on Earth," David mutters, but joins him nonetheless.

"It's so pretty," Daniel breathes.

He's right, David supposes. There are stars and colours and it does look pretty magical. But it's still a prison. Or a moat around a prison. He hasn't figured out the details yet, but whatever. The point is that they're trapped here, and there's no hope amongst the stars. As pretty as it all is, it can't save them.

"Yeah," David says, nodding in agreement. "Yeah, it is."


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAAHH I'M SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG IT'S BEEN,, A WEEK DMFMDFMGNDSKM
> 
> also sorry if there are typos im gay and tired :pensive:

The rest of the day is uneventful for the most part. In the evening, Daniel gets restless and says something about going for a walk, so David goes to hang out with Jasper at the bar.

"How's your friend?" Jasper asks somewhat disdainfully, and David frowns, swirling the chocolate milk in his glass.

"Listen, Jasper, Daniel's a _really_ nice guy. I mean it, he's- he's so sweet and nice and I really care about him and he cares about me. And he didn't mean to be rude yesterday, he's just going through some stuff, and-"

"David," Jasper interrupts, "I get it. Listen, as long as you're happy, I'm happy."

David briefly wonders, not for the firet time, if Jasper can actually feel happy - or if he can feel anything, for that matter - but he decides not to say anything other than a quiet "thank you".

Jasper smiles. "Anytime. You are my favourite customer. And... my closest friend." He pauses. "Actually, I'm pretty sure you're my only friend."

"Aww, Jasper! Well, maybe you and Daniel will become friends too if you give him a chance."

"I'll give him a chance. I still don't trust him, though. There's something about him. I dunno. It's like a visceral feeling, man."

"Okay, don't take this the wrong way, but you're an android bartender. I don't think you can _have_ visceral feelings."

Jasper laughs, and for a moment, it sounds a little too human. David isn't sure if Jasper has ever actually laughed before. He smiles a lot, but now that David thinks about it, he doesn't really express emotion aside from that. Again, David finds himself wondering if Jasper does really feel things, or if he's just programmed to speak and act the way he does.

"What's it like?" David asks quite suddenly, and sips his drink. "Being an android, I mean? I've never really asked."

"I- I'm," Jasper falters. "I'm not really sure how to answer that question. I guess I've never really known anything else, so I don't have anything to compare it to."

David thinks about that for a minute. It makes sense, really. "Can you feel pain?"

"Uh... I don't know, I never really thought about that."

"Oh."

Jasper grins. "Punch me."

"Excuse me?"

"Punch me so we can find out whether or not I can feel pain."

At this, David starts laughing. "I'm not punching you!"

"Why not? Do it. I dare you."

"I'm not going to p-"

Suddenly there's a hand on David's shoulder. He jumps and turns around. "Daniel!" he exclaims, smiling brightly. "How's it going?"

"Not bad," Daniel answers, sitting beside him. "I thought I'd find you here. I- is that chocolate milk in a wine glass?"

"...No?"

Daniel laughs. "Okay," he says, shaking his head. "Evening, Jasper. Could I have a shot of gin, please?"

"Sure." Jasper's face is expressionless, and now it's hard to imagine him as anything but a lifeless machine. David frowns. Just two minutes ago they were laughing and joking together, and Jasper seemed almost human. But now, he's just the android bartender again. David wonders what that's about. And then Jasper hesitates as he picks up a bottle of gin. "You want something with this? Lemonade?"

"No, thank you."

Jasper frowns, but pours the drink anyway.

"So," David begins, suddenly on edge. Where did that come from? He was fine a minute ago. Maybe it's the fact that he's with another real life human being now, and he's still adjusting to having that kind of company. That probably makes sense, right? Oh, God, he's overthinking this. "Um, what have you been up to?"

"Just wandering around the ship," Daniel answers. "It's a lot bigger than I thought. Got a bit lost." He downs his drink, which makes David frown. That was neat gin, right? Which is... pretty strong, right? And aren't you supposed to mix it with something? David isn't sure, but either way, it worries him.

"Oh," David says, trying to mask his concern, "yeah, it's- it's big. But it does get easier to find your way around. I usually stay down this end of the ship, though."

Daniel doesn't say anything. He just nods slightly and stares off into the distance. A quiet moment passes. "Can I get another drink?" he suddenly asks, breaking the mildly awkward silence.

"Of course," Jasper answers. "You want the same again?"

"Please," Daniel says quietly, and Jasper fills his glass again.

"Are you okay...?" David asks softly.

"Yeah." Daniel slams back the gin and grimaces. "No. I don't know."

The crushing guilt returs. Daniel feels bad and it's all David's fault. He shouldn't have done it, he shouldn't have woken him up. "I'm sorry," David whispers. He wants to cry.

"Don't be. It isn't your fault."

_Yes it is!_ God, he wants to _scream!_ It's his fault, it's all his fault! He's a worthless, selfish piece of shit!

Daniel stands up suddenly. "I should go to bed," he says, and David doesn't miss the slight slur to his words.

"Okay, I'll- I can walk you to your room?"

Daniel stumbles slightly as he starts walking, and David hurries to take his arm to steady him.

"Thanks," Daniel mutters, leaning against him.

"Are you okay?"

"Just... tired." He makes a sound that's somewhere between laugh and a groan. "Also a fucking lightweight."

"Oh. Oh, you did drink those shots awfully fast... are you okay? Do you- are you-? Okay- okay, let's get you to bed."

The walk back to Daniel's room is relatively painless, and David manages to get him up to the bed in one piece, which is always a good thing.

"Thanks," Daniel says, drawing out the S sound for a little longer than necessary.

"It's okay. Are you- are you feeling okay? Can I get you anything? Water?"

"No no no, I'm good." Daniel states into David's eyes a little bit too intensely. "You're pretty," he whispers, and David flushes.

"Y- you're drunk."

"I am not drunk."

"You should go to sleep."

For a moment David thinks Daniel is going to argue, but then he lies down and closes his eyes. "Will you stay with me?" he asks.

Yes. _Yes._ God, he wants to. He wants to say yes. He wants to stay.

He doesn't deserve to, though.

"I don't think so, Daniel." He takes a deep breath. "Go to sleep, okay? I'll come check on you in the morning."  
As he gets up to leave, Daniel grabs his wrist.

"Please stay," Daniel says. "I don't want to be alone."

Neither does David. It... wouldn't hurt, right?

Well, the damage is done. David woke him up and he can't take that back. So maybe he should try to make the most of it?

"Okay. Okay, I'll stay."

Within minutes they're cuddled up under the blankets, and it's nice. It's warm and soft and Daniel's arms wrapped around him feel so good and so right.   
It isn't long before Daniel is asleep. It takes David a lot longer, though. He lies awake, listening to Daniel's soft breathing, plagued by his guilty conscience. As nice as it is to be held like this, to have this close comfort that he's craved for so long, he can't enjoy it. Not really. Not unless he's honest and admits to what he's done.

Not unless he confesses to Daniel.

Which he _can't_ do. He has no _idea _how Daniel would react. They might never talked again. They could even get in a fight. David doesn't know how to fight! He can barely even throw a punch! God, this is so awful!

Okay, okay, maybe he's a little bit ahead of himself. But still, this situation is definitely less than ideal. He finally has what he wants, but he's not _okay._

He needs to tell Daniel. He _needs_ to. If he doesn't, it'll just eat away at him until he finally cracks and does something stupid. If Daniel never wants to see him again after he finds out the truth, so be it. It's better than getting close to him and knowing that he doesn't deserve it.

Plus, it's literally been two days, and the guilt is _killing _him. If David doesn't come clean sooner rather than later, he'll probably lose his mind.

But how the heck is he supposed to _tell _Daniel? He can't just come out and say it just like that. What if it blows up in his face? What if Daniel reacts badly and they get in a fight and David gets hurt? No, no, Daniel wouldn't hurt him, he's sure, but... it's not really a risk he wants to take.

Maybe he could write it down in a letter. Yeah, that's a good idea. Hide away in his room for a couple of days to give Daniel time to process the information. Okay. That seems like a good plan.

David decides that he'll do it first thing tomorrow morning. He'll get up early and write a note and leave it in Daniel's room, and then go back to his own room and wait for things to cool down. He just has to make sure that he wakes up before Daniel does so he can slip away quietly. Which won't be difficult. Daniel's pretty much unconscious. Plus, he's probably going to have a bad hangover tomorrow morning. It's the perfect time to do it.

Okay. He's going to do it. He's going to tell Daniel the truth.

Not before getting some sleep, though, because he's _exhausted._

Tomorrow. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'ALL HOLY SHIT DID U SEE THAT NEW EPISODE. DAMN. DAMN. DAMN. DA


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this took me way longer to write than it should have bro. bro. i wrote most of it in one go and then the last like 300 words i Couldn't Get Right so it took like four dAYS SMDMFLDSFM GOD
> 
> so sorry if this one vibes different i was in a weird sort of flow idk
> 
> fair warning this one gets a little spicy towards the end but it's not smut technically :flushed:

He's woken up by someone shaking his shoulder. David sits up, disoriented and tired and not quite ready to wake up yet.

"Get up," Daniel says. "I made you breakfast."

"What?" David mumbles, confused. "Is- it's morning already?"

"Yes, that is generally what happens when you go to sleep. You wake up and it's morning. Get _up."_

David rubs his eyes and stands up, still not entirely with it. "You made me breakfast."

"Yeah." Daniel pauses. "Well, kind of. I tried to. It didn't work. So we're going out for breakfast! Come on."

"Going out where?"

"There's a diner like five minutes away," Daniel informs him, "and they're supposed to have really good waffles. Let's _go."_

The diner is just five minutes walk away like Daniel said, but David's only half awake, so it takes twice as long. David has been here before, once or twice. And Daniel's right, the waffles are really good, but by God David would really rather be back in bed right now.

They're served by stupid stupid robot waiters, which would be cool, except he'd much rather they were served by real life people. It hits him again - this must be the six hundredth time, he's lost count - that he's never going to see another human being again. Other than Daniel, of course, but he doesn't really deserve Daniel's company, because it's his fault that he-

Shit, his plan. He had a plan. He was going to confess to Daniel. He was going to write a note, he- shit, he had it all planned out! But _no,_ Daniel had to go and ruin it by dragging him out of bed for _waffles._

"Why are we here?" David mutters, resting his head on the table. God, he's so tired. And Daniel's bed is so warm and comfy and nice. It would be nice to go back to bed and crawl under the covers and just stay there for a year or three.

"Because," Daniel says, "breakfast is the most important meal of the day. And also I wanted to do something nice for you to thank you for being so kind to me ever since I woke up."

Fuck. "Did you have to wake me up? You couldn't have just _waited-"_

Shit, here he his, complaining about Daniel waking _him _up, when-

Fuck, fuck, fuck. His _plan. _He had a fucking plan and Daniel had to go and ruin it!

"Come on, David, I'm trying to do something nice here."

"Well clearly no one ever taught you how to be nice," David snaps, and then instantly regrets it. "Gosh, I'm so sorry, I'm so so sorry I didn't mean that at _all_ I- I don't know _why _I'm so grumpy this morning. I'm sorry."

He does know why. It's because he had a _plan, _and now it's _ruined._

"It's fine! I shouldn't have woken you up. Guess you're not a morning person, huh?"

"I am! I love mornings! I mean, I don't _hate_ them! I-" David falters, and frowns. "I mean, I... I'm not usually like this."

"Just eat the waffle, David."

David pokes at his waffle with his fork and frowns some more. "How come you're so okay, anyway? You were kind of drunk last night. I figured you'd probably have a headache or- or something."

"Oh, I don't really get hungover," Daniel says. He pauses for a long moment, and then smiles slightly. "I meant what I said, by the way. Last night."

"What do you mean?"

"About you being pretty."

David flushes and blinks several times, trying to work out if he misheard that or not. "Wh- what?" he eventually stammers, looking up but not fully able to meet Daniel's eyes.

"I said," Daniel begins, his voice hushed, leaning forwards slightly across the table. He stares at David intensely, forcing him to make eye contact. _"I think you're pretty."_

"O- oh," David says. Now he's completely unable to break eye contact, like it's some weird fucking staring contest. He's scared to blink in case it breaks the spell andhe wakes up and realises it was all a dream, it was too good to be true. This _is_ too good to be true. It's also awful awful _awful._ He doesn't _deserve this._ He's blushing and he doesn't know what to say and he can't look away he can't look away _he can't look away-_

"I've thought about kissing you," Daniel says, and David feels himself blushing even more, if that's even possible. "Is that weird? I know we don't really know each other."

David just shakes his head ever so slightly, not trusting himself to say anything in case his voice fails him. Even if he wanted to, he doesn't know what he would even say. 'I've thought about kissing you too'? Well, it wouldn't be a lie. But what if Daniel's lying? What if this is all a sick joke?

"I'd like to know you, though," Daniel continues. "You seem nice. And we are literally the last two humans alive. Kind of."

"Is that why you dragged me out of bed?" David asks quietly, smiling slightly, still maintaining eye contact.

Daniel grins. "No. I dragged you out of bed for waffles."

"Why?"

"Because waffles are good. And I was going to bring you breakfast in bed but I can't cook."

David smiles slightly. "Oh," he says softly.

"Yeah, I burnt the toast. But... I wanted to tell you. I like you, David. And I want you to feel the same way about me."

There's a long silence in which David questions his life choices. He shouldn't have woken Daniel up. He shouldn't have even thought about it. Christ, he should have stayed on Earth.

But what's done is done. He knows this. And he _was_ planning on telling Daniel the truth, but... maybe he can tell him a different truth. For now.

God, no, this is not an ideal situation at _all._

But what else can he do?

"I do," David says, and then realises that now he sounds like they're getting married or something, which is crazy and stupid- "I mean, I do feel... the same." Finally he breaks eye contact. Stares down at his plate. When he speaks his voice is quiet and shy. "I like you too."

"Okay," Daniel says. "Okay. Then you'll let me take you out on a date?"

"On a what?" David squeaks. He's _sure_ he misheard. Surely Daniel wouldn't actually want to-

"I'll pick you up at six." Daniel stands up. "Actually, you should probably pick me up, seeing as I don't know where your room is, but... I'll see you then?"

David nods slowly. "Okay. I'll see you then."

As Daniel leaves, David wonders if this was worth being woken up for.

***

At ten to six, David begins to wonder if time was even real. Sure, the clock on his phone _says _it's ten to six, but is it _really?_ They're floating through space. They aren't moving around the sun anymore. Surely time is completely different out here?  
  
David shakes his head, sighing to himself. It doesn't _matter_ whether or not time is real. Plus, it's messing with his head, and he would actually really rather not think things like "is time even real?" or "oh, I'm floating through space! Fun!" just ten minutes before his date.

If minutes even exist.

Either way, he's going to be late if he doesn't hurry up and get ready, and now really isn't the best time to think about all that existential crisis fuel, because he's going on a date. With Daniel.

_He's going on a date with Daniel._

God. Okay. This is fine.

***

When Daniel opens the door, the first thing that David notices is that the room is set to look like some sort of aquarium. Colourful fish swim up the walls in shoals, and it makes David smile.

The second thing he noticed is that Daniel looks very nice. Like, really _really _nice. Well, he always looks nice, but right now in this moment he looks extremely nice. David half wonders if they should cancel the date and just stay in Daniel's room and kiss and-

"Hi," David says, somewhat successfully banishing that train of thought for the twentieth time. "You look nice."

Daniel grins, leaning against the doorway. "Thanks. So do you."

"Thank you." David ducks his head, trying to hide his dumb blush and stupid stupid smile. Okay, this is fine. This is fine.

"Are you nervous?" Daniel asks, and David nods slowly.

"I've never been on a date before." He mentally kicks himself because that probably made him sound like a huge loser and now Daniel will laugh at him and hate him forever-

"That's okay! It'll be super chill, I promise. Come on, let's go." Daniel shuts the door behind him and takes David's hand. It doesn't occur to David to ask where they're actually going as he's dragged off down the corridor because they're _holding hands._

***

Apparently Daniel's idea of 'super chill' is watching a horror movie. David isn't entirely sure how Daniel came to this conclusion, because from _his_ experience, horror movies are actually the opposite of chill, really.

There's a movie theatre on the ship, and honestly, going to the cinema makes a pretty good first date in David's opinion. He was a little anxious about having to make conversation or awkward silences or saying the wrong thing, but watching a movie means they don't even really have to talk. It's great! It's a good idea.

And it's a little weird being the only two people in the room, but there's popcorn, and it's nice.

But a _horror movie?_ David was expecting something upbeat like a romantic comedy or... y'know, maybe a Disney movie. But Daniel had to go and choose some scary horrible nasty horror movie.

David wonders who the hell even makes these movies. And who the hell actually enioys them. They're nasty and pointless and unenjoyable. But Daniel doesn't seem at all bothered by it.

And then halfway through, David jumps at a particularly scary part, and screams slightly, and clings onto Daniel's arm and buries his face in Daniel's shoulder, and suddenly he gets it. Daniel _knew_ he'd react like this. He _planned_ this. Maybe seeing David get scared is amusing or endearing to him. Maybe he just wants to be physically close, and he knew that David would cling on to him like a baby. Either way, it makes David smile. Daniel really cares about him. Even if he is a sly bastard.

With his face nuzzled against Daniel's chest, David realises that this is what it feels like to be happy. Even if this is a horrible, horrible movie. Daniel's soft, and he smells nice, and David definitely wants to stay like this forever.

Of course, the crushing guilt makes an appearance, but David tries to ignore that. He's _going _to tell Daniel. He was going to today, but things happened and it just wasn't the right time. But he _will. _He'll confess. He'll tell Daniel the truth. At some point. Just... not now. Now is good, and he doesn't want to ruin that. Not yet.

***

After the movie they get dinner and then head back to Daniel's room. It has been a good evening. The best evening he's had in a long time.

"Thank you for tonight," David says when they get to Daniel's room and collapse on the couch. There are still fish on the walls. It really is like being in an aquarium. "It was nice. Even if I had my eyes closed half the time."

Daniel laughs slightly at this. "You were so cute," he says. He pauses, and then he grazes David's cheek with the back of one hand. "You are... so gorgeous..."

They're both leaning in before David can even process what's happening. Their lips brush ever so slightly, and it's like this was meant to happen.

And then Daniel pulls away. Smiles. "I've been wanting to do this for a while now."

David figures that now probably isn't the best time to mention that he's been wanting this for a lot longer. "Then do it."

Their lips touch again, harder this time, more certain. And then Daniel is kissing him. Really, properly kissing him. David hasn't ever been kissed like this before, ever, and it's like nothing he's ever felt before. For so long he's wanted to be close to Daniel, and now they're _kissing. _He wants to laugh or yell or cry or dance around the room. Instead he opens his mouth slightly, allowing Daniel's tongue to slip past his lips, deepening the kiss. It's so good, and he's so so desperate for it. He wants more and more and more. This is maybe the best thing he's ever felt.

Daniel breaks the kiss and pulls back slightly, his breathing heavy. "You okay?"

"Uh huh," David breathes out, and grabs Daniel's collar, pulling him in for another kiss. This time it's more intense, more heated. Daniel bites at David's lower lip, making him whimper. And then Daniel straddles his lap, and David blushes hard, because _holy shit, Daniel's on top of him,_ and they're going so fast but he's so _okay_ with it. Lips and teeth graze his throat. A cool hand slips under his shirt, pushing the fabric up, exposing his stomach.

"I want you so bad," Daniel says, grinding down into David's lap, voice low in his ear. "Do you-?"

"Yes! I- I mean, yes, please-"

Daniel's lips smash against his again, almost aggressive now, and the roughness has David moaning into the kiss.

"Daniel," David gasps as they pull apart, "please, please-"

"Tell me what you want."

"I want-"  
David briefly wonders if it's weird to have sex on a couch in the middle of a room that looks like an aquarium. What if it makes the fish uncomfortable? Okay, yeah, they're hologram fish, but-  
God, whatever. "I want you. I- please, I- I want you to fuck me."

David's shirt is ripped off, and - for the time being, at least - the crushing guilt is gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ohohoh. ohohohoho. >:)


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M BACK LADS
> 
> ok so it's like 5.30am so i apologise for any mistakes there may be in this one sFMDNDMN
> 
> also? there's a fuckin moth in my room it keeps flying in my face 
> 
> anyway

David wakes up early. If he was on Earth, it would be one of those mornings where the sun is only just rising and the world is quite and peaceful. But he isn't on Earth, and it isn't one of those mornings. Not really. He wonders for the thousandth time if morning actually exists. If it's even morning at all. Not really. Sure, his body is programmed to _think _it's morning, but there's no time out here, not really. Morning and evening mean nothing.

Nothing means anything at all anymore.

For a long time he lies awake and considers following through with his previous plan. Daniel's still asleep. It would be easy for David to get up and write a note. Slip away. Shut himself in his room and wait there until Daniel is calm.

But it's too late now. He took it too far. And now it's too late. He can't tell Daniel the truth, not now. They had _sex._

_They had sex._

David is filled with way too many confusing, conflicting emotions. Happiness, regret, love, anger. Mostly anger. At himself for waking Daniel up in the first place, and for not confessing like he planned. At Daniel for messing things up.  
He knows that that's unfair, but he can't help feeling mad. Daniel couldn't have just made things easy for him. Now he's stuck in this awful, awful situation and he doesn't know what to _do._

He _wants_ to tell the truth.

But he can't. Not now. Not after... well... _that._

Next to him, Daniel shifts, nuzzling his face into David's neck. "What time is it?" he mumbles.

"I don't know," David whispers. "Early. Like, five o'clock, I think."

Daniel groans and presses a soft kiss to David's cheek. "Go back to sleep."

As appealing as that sounds, David knows that he won't fall asleep again now. He's just going to lie awake worrying and making himself miserable. "I'm gonna go get something to drink," he says quietly, untangling himself from Daniel's embrace. Daniel just makes a vague sort of affirmative noise and promptly goes back to sleep.

David goes down the stairs and leaves the room, heading out into the corridor. As he closes the door behind him, the lights flicker slightly. It's dark for a brief second, so brief he wonders if perhaps he imagined it, or blinked longer than he meant to. But then the lights flicker off again. Soon enough they're back to normal. Weird.

He makes his way to the bar. He doesn't want to be alone right now, but he needs a break from Daniel. Yeah, they had a good time - a _great _time - and David's happy with Daniel, and he is maybe a little bit in love with him. But the guilt is just too much right now. He needs to get away for a while.

"Good morning," Jasper says softly as David sits down. He looks tired, which is strange, seeing as he's an android, and it isn't possible for him to feel tired. Maybe David imagined it. "Can I get you a drink?"

"I had sex," David says, and then covers his face with his hands out of shame. "With Daniel."

"Oh," Jasper says. David peeks at Jasper between his fingers. He looks somewhere between disgusted and amused. And bothered. And confused. And actually a whole array of emotions, really, for an android. "You _do_ need a drink."

Jasper pours what looks like a shot of vodka and slides it towards David.

"Jasper, this is alcohol."

"Yeah."

"You _never _let me have alcohol."

"Well, I'm making an exception. Tell me what happened."

David frowns at Jasper, but then at the shot glass in front of him. He hasn't had alcohol for literal years - decades, actually - and he knows that this probably isn't the best idea. However, the guilt is getting worse. It's starting to make him feel sick, and, at this point, he's willing to try anything to make it go away. And maybe alcohol would help.  
Ignoring the voice in the back of his mind telling him that using alcohol as a coping mechanism is a horrible idea, he downs the shot.

"So," David starts, blinking slightly at the lack of effect the alcohol has on him. It's surprising. He doesn't feel any different. "Yesterday I was planning on getting up early and writing a note to Daniel explaining that I woke him up. And then I was going to leave and give him some space and time to process it, y'know? Telling him is the right thing to do, right? So that's what i was going to do. But-"

"But you didn't," Jasper finishes, and David nods miserably.

"He woke up before me and dragged me out of bed to go get waffles and then he told me he likes me and wants to go on a date with me so we went to see a movie and it was scary and then we had dinner and then-"

"David, slow down."

David takes a deep breath, trying not to burst into tears. "And then we went back to his room and I slept with him! I should have come clean but I _didn't_ I took advantage of him and I'm a terrible person!"

"Why are you so upset?" Jasper asks. "Didn't you have a nice time?"

"Yes! That's the problem!"

There's a long pause. "Sorry, I don't understand."

David sighs. Of course Jasper doesn't understand. He's a robot. He's basically a computer. And David feels stupid for coming here. There's no point in trying to explain it to Jasper. "Forget it," he says, tapping his fingers on the bar counter. "I wouldn't expect you to understand. Thanks for listening, though."

"I want to understand," Jasper says suddenly. "Maybe you could explain it some more?"

"I don't think there's much point." David sighs again. "I just... I want to be with Daniel. But I can't keep pretending that I didn't wake him up. I did a terrible thing, and he deserves to know the truth. But if I tell him the truth, he probably won't want to be with me. He probably won't ever want to talk to me again."

"Okay. Okay. So... you can be dishonest but maintain the relationship you want, or you can tell the truth but risk losing that relationship."

"Exactly!"

"So? The second option is the obvious choice. You won't be happy in a relationship built on dishonesty. It's better to risk losing the relationship and do the right thing."

"Yeah, I know! That's what I was _going_ to do! But then we had _sex,_ and now it's like I've taken it too far! I can't tell him the truth after that! He'll never forgive me!"

"Why did you sleep with him if you knew it would complicate things?"

"I.. it was... it just kind of happened." David exhales slowly. "I guess it felt like the right thing to do in the moment. I mean, it _was. _It was... really good. But it changes everything, you know?"

Jasper shakes his head. "I don't know much about that stuff, David. But I think you know what you have to do."

"I do...?"

"You won't settle into a healthy, happy relationship if you're not completely honest with him," Jasper says. "You know that."

"Yeah, I guess you're right..."

"I'm always right." Jasper smiles slightly, and takes David's empty shot glass. "You know you have to tell the truth. Forget about whether or not he'll forgive you; you won't be able to forgive _yourself_ until you do."

Jasper has a point. Jasper has a very good point, and David knows it. Maybe he doesn't need Daniel to forgive him. Maybe he needs to forgive _himself._

"Thank you," David says, "I know what I need to do now. You give pretty good advice for an android bartender."

"Well, you know what they say about android bartenders," Jasper replies, and David shakes his head.

"No? I don't? What do they-"

"Just go, David."

***

When he's halfway back to Daniel's room, the vodka kicks in. It feels like someone punching him the head. David decides that vodka shots are an objectively bad idea.  
He thinks about what he wants to say to Daniel. He thinks about writing a note, but decides he it would be weird now. It would be like breaking up with someone over text or something. Not cool.  
Or maybe he's overthinking this whole thing, and he needs to chill. Yeah.

"I'm back," David says upon entering the room. Before he even has time to shut the door, he's slammed against the wall, lips and teeth against his neck.

"I missed you," Daniel growls in his ear, and David feels himself flush.

"I- I- I missed you t-"  
His sentence is cut short when Daniel's hips nudge against his, causing his brain to short circuit slightly. "Daniel ple-"

Daniel grabs his face with both hands and kisses him deeply. David's eyes slip shut, melting into the kiss. Daniel's so good at-

Shit, he has to focus. He _has_ to come clean to Daniel! If he doesn't do it now, he probably won't ever have the guts to confess, and then he'll have to live with the guilt for the rest of his life!

The kiss breaks, and David sticks his hand out to stop Daniel from kissing him again. "Wait, listen! I- I have something to tell you. I mean, something I want to talk about."

"Can it wait?" Daniel asks seductively, and David finds himself wanting to say yes.

"No! It can't wait!" he shouts instead, on the verge of tears.

Daniel raises his eyebrows at David's slight outburst, and backs away. "Okay, okay. Come on, let's go sit down."  
He leads David over to the couch, where they both sit down.

David's shaking. He doesn't want to do this. He _really_ doesn't want to do this. He doesn't want to have this conversation.  
But he has to, and he knows he has to.

"What's this about?" Daniel asks gently, now understanding that something's wrong. He doesn't look nervous, just concerned.

"I did something bad," David whispers. He's crying now.

"David...?"

David looks down at the floor, unable to make eye contact. His voice trembles as he speaks. "It's my fault you're awake. I disabled your hibernation pod." He inhales sharply. "I woke you up."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i just realised that i started this chapter with the sentence "David wakes up early." haha that's kinda ironic and h
> 
> ANYWAY I'M SO SORRY FOR THIS CHAPTER. next chapter's gonna be a little bit angsty but it gets better don't worry 
> 
> i also started writing a jaspdanvid flower shop tattoo shop au so look out for that! call me cliched but,, :))


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cabin fever chapter 10: daniel goes apeshit

"Oh," Daniel says, "okay."  
And that's it.

No cursing or yelling or crying.

He doesn't look mad, or upset, or really anything at all.

"Okay?" David echoes nervously. "You're not- you're not mad?"

"No, of course I'm not mad. I'm not mad, I- "  
Daniel's eye twitches. He stands up and walks towards the bathroom. "Just- one minute, I- just give- I'll be-"

David nervously chews on his lip as he watches the bathroom door close and hears the lock click.

The bathroom is pretty soundproof, and David almost doesn't hear Daniel screaming for three straight minutes.

...

It's really not that soundproof.

David wonders if he should leave. He doesn't. He stays. Just in case Daniel tries to hurt himself or do something stupid.

Eventually the bathroom door's lock clicks, and Daniel returns. He looks pale. Paler than usual, anyway. He doesn't say anything. Just sits down on the couch next to David, not as close as he was before.

"I'm sorry," David says quietly. So quietly that when he doesn't get a reply, he starts to think that maybe Daniel didn't hear him.

And then Daniel nods, and then shakes his head. "Tell me what happened."

David takes a shaky breath. "I... woke up too soon, I was on the ship on my own for more than a year, and... I was starting to... I felt like I was losing my mind. I- I tried to kill myself."

"Oh," Daniel says softly.

"On that night, I saw- I- I collapsed in the hibernation bay. Against your pod. And- and y- you looked like an angel. I think you saved my life."  
He pauses for a long moment, and Daniel doesn't say anything, so he continues. "I couldn't stop thinking about you. I wanted- I wanted to know you. I found your video diaries-"

"You do _realise _how _fucked up_ that is, don't you?"

David suppresses a small sob. "I know! I know, and I tried to stop, but you were the only thing keeping me sane, and I wasn't thinking, and..."  
His voice drops to a whisper. "I didn't want to be alone anymore."

Two painfully silent minutes pass.

"How long ago...?" Daniel begins, but trails off. David answers anyway.

"It was... weeks."

"Oh."

"I wanted to tell you sooner. I was going to write a note, but then... yesterday, and..."

There's another long uncomfortable silence.

"I get why you did it," Daniel says eventually.

"You're not angry?"

"Oh, no, I'm angry. But I get it."

"I'm sorry..."

Daniel lets out a long sigh. "You did what you had to do to survive. And I don't blame you. I would have done the same thing."

"Why aren't you yelling at me?" David whispers, tears running down his face.

Daniel smiles slightly. "You want me to yell at you?"

"No..."

"What do you want?"

"I want to go home," David says quietly, choking on his words as the tears fall from his eyes.

Daniel opens his arms, an invitation which David gladly accepts, climbing into his lap and sobbing into his shoulder. The only things he can think of are Daniel's arms around him and how sorry he is.

"I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm so so sorry," he mumbles on a loop, as if it'll fix things, as if apologising a hundred times will make things better. He's sorry he's sorry he's _sorry _and he says it until he loses coherence and the words don't mean anything anymore. Still they tumble from his lips like an awful, guilty prayer. He's sorry until his brain starts to switch off, until he isn't really there anymore. As he cries, Daniel whispers soothing things in his ears. He doesn't know what. It doesn't matter. Daniel's voice is enough.

***

An hour later, David wakes up, still in Daniel's arms. He doesn't remember falling asleep.

"Hey," he whispers.

"Hey," Daniel echoes quietly, "are you okay?"

David nods, but he's already crying again. Or maybe he never stopped crying, it's hard to tell. "Yeah. Are you?"

"Yeah." Daniel reaches out a hand to wipe the tears from David's cheeks. "Hey, no more crying, okay? We'll get through this."

"Okay," David says, sniffling slightly. "You're so kind. I'm sorry, I don't know why I'm crying, _you_ should be the one crying, I did something so horrible and you're being so _nice _to me and- why are you being so nice to me?! I don't-"

"David, I _love_ you."

Oh. _Oh._

Oh oh oh.

"Oh," David says softly. _"Oh._ I... really? You mean that?"

Daniel nods. "I mean it. I love you."

"Oh. I love you too."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

There's a long silence.

"Look," Daniel says, "I believe that everything happens for a reason. This is all part of a predetermined path that-"  
He stops himself, and for a moment there's something in his eyes that David doesn't recognise. "I think we were _meant_ to wake up. I think we were meant to be together. That night you saw me... didn't it feel _right?_ Doesn't this feel right?"

"...Yeah, it did. It does." David blinks slowly. "You really think-... you're really not upset?"

"I was at first, but I've been thinking. What if this is all part of some bigger plan? What if we were chosen for a reason?"  
_Wait... chosen?_  
With each word, Daniel becomes more frantic and emphatic. "What if there's something wrong with this ship? Maybe you waking up wasn't an accident. Maybe it was divine intervention. Maybe we would have both died otherwise, and you saved my life!"

Unnerved, David frowns. "Daniel, you're scaring me..."

"No, but that's just it! We don't have to be scared anymore! Someone's looking out for us!"

Shaking his head slightly, David slips off Daniel's lap and stands up. "No. No, that's not... This was all a mistake. Me waking up, that was an accident. It was a coincidence. It was bad luck. You can't really think that..."  
Maybe Daniel isn't as okay with this as David thought.  
"I- I think I should go..."

Daniel grabs his wrist suddenly, making him jump. "Don't go! Didn't you hear me? We're meant to be _together!"_

David pulls away. Daniel's grip is strong, but he's stronger. He breaks free from Daniel's grasp and runs from the room.

It isn't until he's out in the corridor that he realises he's trembling.

God. What the _fuck_ was _that?_

_Stop shaking. Stop-_

Whatever it was, he doesn't want to be around Daniel right now. For the first time in over a year, David wants to be alone.

He runs.

***

He finds himself at the bar. Maybe he doesn't want to be alone after all.

"David, what's wrong?" Jasper asks, concerner. "You look upset."

_Don't cry don't cry don't cry._

"I told Daniel the truth. I told him that I woke him up."

"Ah. How did he take it?"

"Pretty good, at first," David answers, his voice wavering slightly. "I mean, he locked himself in the bathroom and screamed for a bit. But after that he was okay with it. At least, that's what I thought. Then I fell asleep for a while, and after that he started acting really weird. I mean _really_ weird, he was talking about... divine intervention, or... I don't know. It was scary."

There's a long pause before Jasper replies. "Davey, how much do you actually _know _about this guy?"

"I..."  
David stops to think about it for a minute. "I don't know. A- a bit? I mean, aside from the videos on his passenger file... I... but I feel like I know him! I really feel like..."  
It hits David that if Daniel comes after him, this will be the first place he looks. "Jasp, I should go. I don't want to talk to him now, and this is the first place he'll come look for me, so..."

"I get it." Jasper smiles slightly. To David's great discomfort, he looks... scared. "Stay safe."

"Thanks. You too." It's a strange thing to say, and David realises as the words are leaving his mouth. It isn't like it really matters, though.

***

It's a big ship. There are plenty of places he can go where Daniel won't find him. Somehow, though, David _wants_ Daniel to find him. He wants to talk. He wants things to be normal between them. Whatever _normal_ is. They've only known each other for a few days. Maybe they still need to figure out what normal actually means.  
Maybe Daniel just freaked out momentarily. Maybe he just needs a bit more time to process everything.

David finds himself in the observatory. It isn't the least obvious hiding place. The observatory is one of the most notable features on the ship.   
He sits for a while, wishing things were different.

It's less than an hour before Daniel finds him. He sits down next to David, staring out of the huge glass window at the stars.

"Hey," Daniel says softly after a moment, looking at David. David says nothing. "Sorry for flipping out on you like that. That wasn't okay."

"It's fine," David replies quietly.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah."

"Do you need me to give you some space?"

David laughs slightly. "I think the last thing I need is more space."

Daniel grins and looks out of the window again. "Right."

Five minutes pass in silence. It's slightly uncomfortable, but not unbearably so.

"What was that about?" David eventually asks, his voice hushed. "All that stuff you said, it sounded..."

"Oh." Daniel sighs. Opens his mouth to say something, then shuts it again. He sighs again. "When- back on Earth, a long time ago, I was part of a... religious group."

"Oh," David says. _A cult, _he thinks, and then he mentally kicks himself for jumping to such conclusions. Still, it kind of makes sense. The video diaries... God, he should have realised sooner.

"We- _they_ believed in some... some things that seem..."  
He trails off, and exhales slowly. "It was a long time ago. I try not to think like that anymore, but... sometimes it's hard, I guess. I'm sorry for scaring you."

"It's okay," David says slowly, "I get that I-... what I told you, it was a lot to process. And it was a really, really horrible thing to do in the first place."

"David... you did a bad thing for a good reason. What was the alternative?"  
He doesn't have to say it. They both already know.   
"And I'm dealing with it," Daniel continues. "Not very well, admittedly, but I'm processing it. And I understand why you did it. I'm _glad_ you did it. I'm glad I get to be with you."

"...Really?"

"Really. I know we haven't known each other for very long, but I _love _you."

David smiles slightly. "I love you too."

"I'm sorry for overreacting before."

"You didn't overreact," David says, and then, "I'm sorry for... everything."

And then they're both laughing, and neither of them really know why, but it feels good. It feels good to let go and pretend that everything isn't quite as terrible as it really is.   
David leans his head on Daniel's shoulder, and they sit for a while, watching the endless cosmos before them. It's kind of scary to see space unfolding in front of them, going nowhere and everywhere at the same time. But with Daniel's arm around him, it doesn't feel so bad.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ohohohohoho. Ohoho :)
> 
> i know i'm behind on jaspdanvid week but i am still doing it, don't worry! i just got a bit carried away for day 2 and ended up starting a whole new chaptered fic sSKFNDMDNDN
> 
> also this fic was originally only gonna be like 10 chapters but it isn't finished yet so?? idk we'll see where it goes but i'm guessing there are gonna be like another 8 chapters or smth


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HOO BOY I'VE BEEN GONE FOR AGES DAMN
> 
> but i'm back bitch! i really rushed editing this so pls excuse any typos thx 😌

A month goes by, and everything is fine. Better than fine. It's great. Perfect, even. David starts to wonder why he ever felt so hopeless.

And then things start to go wrong.

It's nothing, at first. A light flickers, he thinks nothing of it. It isn't the first time. Probably just a faulty bulb. Another flicker here and there.

And then the coffee machine in the cafeteria breaks. It doesn't seem like a big deal at first. Things break all the time. It's annoying, sure, but not so unusual. It's probably normal. If the crew members were awake, an electrician would probably come and fix it, get it working again within minutes. But no one else is awake, and David isn't that tech savvy, so he punches it. Sure, he can disable a hibernation pod, but a coffee machine is too complicated for him. Maybe he should have read up on coffee machines in all that time he spent alone. Maybe he should go and wake an electrician so they can fix it.

Maybe he's a little bit tetchy because he hasn't had his coffee yet.

He gives up on punching the coffee machine and goes to the diner where he and Daniel got waffles that one time. They've got to have coffee at a diner, right?   
But when he tries to ask the robot waiters for some coffee, they don't respond.

"Hello?" he says impatiently, beginning to get frustrated. If he doesn't get some coffee soon he _is_ going to scream. That or go back to bed. Or both. Either way, the stupid robots aren't responding. He kicks one and it beeps sadly. David bites his lip, feeling immediately guilty for kicking it. Poor robot. He mumbles a quick apology and heads to the bar instead.

"Hey, Jasper-" he starts. And then he notices the shattered glass all over the floor. That's- well, that's alarming. Jasper stands unnaturally still, even for him, holding the stem of a smashed wine glass. "Jasper? What _happened?"_

There's a long and painful silence. "I'm not feeling so good, man," Jasper eventually says, too quietly. There's something off about his voice. It's more computer than usual.

"Jasper..." David says softly, picking his way through the shards of glass towards the counter, reaching out to touch Japser's hand as he speaks. "What's going on? Are you okay? Why is there so much glass on the floor? Did something happen? What- ow!"  
The second David's hand touches Jasper's there's a spark that gives David an unpleasant electric shock. "What was _that?"_

Jasper doesn't say anything. His eyes look empty.

"Jasper?"  
David waves a hand in front of his face. The android doesn't respond. "No, no, no," he mutters, "this can't be good..."

He moves away from the bar, suddenly filled with a sense of panic. It reminds him of how he felt the day he woke up, when he realised he was alone. A bad feeling. _Bad bad bad._ He races back to Daniel's room.   
Halfway there, the bright lights of the corridor shut off. Not a flicker. Not this time. Complete, full darkness. David stumbles and falls to the ground with a yell.

_Fuck,_ it's so dark, how is he is to get back to Daniel? The panic rises, and he attempts to crawl forwards, but his brain tells him to stop, he'll crash into a wall, there are things in the darkness, creatures waiting to get him-

He eventually just starts screaming, or sobbing, it's hard to tell, crying out and shouting for Daniel. All he wanted was some _fucking coffee._

He has no idea how many minutes have passed but he hears running footsteps, and suddenly feels hands grabbing at him, making him scream louder. It's all happening so fast and he can't see and holy shit he's going to die-

"Don't hurt me! Don't hurt me!" he shrieks. The hands turn to arms wrapped around him.

"Shh, shh, it's me!"

David falls silent. "Daniel?"

"Shh, it's okay. It's okay. I'm here now."

Waves of relief wash over him like warm water. He starts crying again, sobbing into Daniel's shoulder. "It's so dark I can't see I was so scared I thought I was gonna die!" he chokes out, barely able to breathe.

Daniel rocks him gently. "It's okay. I'm here."

"H- how did you find me?"

"You were screaming pretty loud."

"I'm sorry, I-"  
David fights back the tears. "I only went to get coffee, but the machine was broken, so I went to the diner to get coffee there, but the robots wouldn't respond, so I went to see Jasper and there was broken glass everywhere and he wasn't right and- it's so dark, I don't like it!"

"It's okay. It's going to be okay. I promise." As if on cue, the lights turn back on, shining without a flicker like nothing happened. Daniel holds him tight. "See? They're back on now. Everything's fine."

David blinks a few times, trying to adjust to the sudden brightness. "No... I don't understand. Why would the lights go off? That isn't supposed to happen. And the coffee machine- and Jasper-"

"I'm sure it's nothing to worry about," Daniel says, but David is still uneasy. "Maybe you should go and lie down... you seem pretty shaken up."

"Maybe, yeah..."

"Hey, I'm sure it was nothing. Probably just a faulty bulb."

David blinks slowly. "That's what I thought last time it happened. But then it was just a flicker. This... this is different. What if something's wrong? I mean, seriously wrong?"

"We're the only people awake on a starship that's floating through space and we're almost certainly never going to leave," Daniel says. "I don't see what could possibly be wrong."

"Ha ha," David says sarcastically, but can't help smiling a little. "We're going to be okay, right?"

"Yeah. We're going to be just fine."

***

Thimgs go back to how they were, more or less. A few days pass. David doesn't leave their room. Everything is fine, but he's on edge. The thing with the light shook him up more than it should have. But it isn't just the light. The coffee machine, and Jasper, and- surely it couldn't have been a coincidence.

The next time he goes to get coffee, the machine is working fine.

The next time he goes to see Jasper, one of the stupid little roomba robots bumps into his foot as he walks into the bar. It spits out a small shard of glass and makes an apologetic beeping noise.  
Aside from that, the bar is... normal. No more shattered glass. Soft music plays, and Jasper greets him with a friendly smile.

"Hi, David," he says. "Would you like something to drink?"

"Would I- what? No! What happened to you?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean the other day when I came in and you freaked out and there was glass everywhere and-"

"Whoa, David, it sounds like you had a bad dream. Would you like some hot chocolate?"

"No, I would not like some hot chocolate!" David exclaims. "I didn't dream it! It happened! You zapped me!"

"Are you sure you don't want hot chocolate? I have mini marshmallows."

"I don't want your mini marshmallows! I want to know what happened here!"

"And whipped cream."

David slams his hand down on the counter, making Jasper jump, which he feels like it shouldn't, seeing as Jasper is an android, and- "I don't want your goddamn whipped cream!" he shouts, and then immediately feels bad about it. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to yell. I just... I'm scared. I came in here the other day and there was broken glass on the floor and you were all glitchy and weird-"

"Ah," says Jasper, "why didn't you say so? Chances are I went offline for a malware scan. It's automatic."

"A what?"

"Y'know, to check for viruses and stuff. Are you sure you don't want something to drink?"

"You mean like, if someone tried to hack your system? Why would you need that? I mean, who would even do that?"

"Scans are just protocol, David. Don't worry about it."

David taps his fingers on the counter impatiently. "Protocol? Is the smashed glass protocol too? There's something you're not telling me, I know it!"

Jasper's eyes go blank. "The passengers on the Starship Avalon sleep for one hundred and twenty years in suspended animation, made possible by specially engineered hibernation pods," he says.

"Don't you start with that. I _know_ you're trying to change the subject."

"Sorry, I don't understand."

David glares at him. "I'm _going_ to get to the bottom of this. Just you wait. You can't stop me."

"Sorry, I don't understand."

David glares some more and gets up to leave. "I'm not going to let this go, you know," he throws over his shoulder on his way out.

He's absolutely certain that he didn't imagine what happened. And Jasper's malware scan bullshit sounded an awful lot like excuses. There _was _something wrong with Jasper, and David is going to find out what it is.

He just needs to figure out how.

***

"If you were an android," David begins, taking his shirt off, "and you had a secret that you didn't want someone to know, but the person really wanted to know, what would they have to do to make you tell them?"

Daniel looks confused. "Is this foreplay?"

"What? No! I'm serious! This is important!"

"Just get in the bed."

"Daniel! Answer the question."

"If I was an android- is this about Jasper?"

David sits down on the bed with a deep sigh. "I just can't get through to him. He said something about it being a scan and it's protocol and it's nothing to worry about but I _know_ he's hiding something."

"Maybe you should just take his word for it. If he's hiding something, it's got to be for a reason, right? Let him have his secrets." Daniel pulls him in for a quick kiss. "Anyway, there are more important things to worry about."

"Oh yeah? Like what?"

"Like this." Daniel kisses him again, and David melts into it, his worries slipping away.   
Maybe Daniel is right. He doesn't need to worry about Jasper right now. They have plenty of time, after all. He can still figure out what's going on with Jasper, but it's not like he has a deadline. He can take some time to relax with his boyfriend.

_Boyfriend._ Oh shit, is Daniel his boyfriend? Have they even discussed that yet?

Whatever, it doesn't matter right now. All that matters in this moment is that they're together and they're kissing and right now, things are good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :) 
> 
> GUYS SINCE I LAST UPDATED I'VE STARTED ACTUALLY USING MY INSTAGRAM ACCOUNT IT'S @NERDUCCI PLS GO FOLLOW ME THX


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